CRAYON CHRONICLES

Moving on and letting go

2010-05-08T10:49:00.000-04:00

Wow! Life has become quite busy--blessings from God pouring down upon us! I've had to "abandon" Godly Graffiti! It was a difficult choice to make, but one that I have felt was the correct thing to do.

Thank you so much to my faithful followers and readers. You can still find me on the web, though!

Divinely Designed blog
Just Be Frugal blog
Christian Life Coaching for Women
Richmond Frugal Family

Stop by to visit! Let me know you found me!

Blessings on your journey

Closer to the Baby Jesus every day

2009-12-22T07:22:00.001-05:00

Many years ago I sewed a plastic canvas/fabric nativity set that my children could play with and touch and not worry about breaking. The "3 Wise Men" are all together as one piece. When my son was little, he loved setting up the nativity set and after he gently placed Jesus in his little fabric 'cradle" and placed all the animals and the shepherds around Mary and Joseph and the baby, he put the Wise men at the far reaches of the room.

Every day he made a point to move the Wise Men. After several days we realized this was a pattern - moving those Wise Men to a new location each day. We assumed he was just playing some imaginary game. Finally we asked him, "Why did you put the Wise Men all the way on the other side of the room and why do you keep moving them?" He told us "they're getting a little closer to the baby Jesus every day. On Christmas they'll find Him." (I know the time line is off, but he definitely "got" the concept and the story of their journey to Jesus.)

Nearly 2 decades later, as we take the nativity set out of the box and my son sets it up on the floor under the tree, I am still reminded to see Christmas through the eyes of a little child.

Blessings on your journey,
Mary

Christmas Angels

2009-12-12T17:44:00.008-05:00

(Please mute my playlist box so you can play the You-Tube performance of Angels We Have Heard On High at the end of this post)

In 1988 I purchased the first in the series of Hallmark's Mary's Angels Christmas ornaments. That is the year my son, our youngest child was born (in May). The first in the series was out that Christmas and while I wasn't really sure he'd grow up to like angels (was it too "girly"?) it was the only series I really liked.

This year, Jeff will receive the 22nd in the series in his stocking! Fortunately, he is a deeply spiritual young man and delights in hanging each angel on the tree every Christmas. Like his mother, he is in awe and wonder of angels and ardently believes in their existence! I delight in stopping by the tree and seeing the--by now--full choir of angels hanging there!

This year has flown by for us and we have had many challenges and obstacles as a family. There were weeks, and even months, where we wished away the experiences we found ourselves in the midst of.

As the year winds to a close, and the Christmas season is upon us, I rejoice in our many blessings. The angels are now too numerous to recall which one was received on which year -- though they are each dated and we could figure it out if we were so inclined. I think it's more enjoyable to look at them as a whole - an entire choir of angels filling up a good portion of our tree - like those that filled the sky one Christmas eve a long, long time ago.

That baby and his family faced many hardships as well. But like each of us, they received the promise of eternity in heaven. Like us, they were no doubt in awe of the choir of angels in the sky on the night Jesus was born, announcing the good news of all time!

Angels we have heard on high
Sweetly singing o'er the plains,
And the mountains in reply
Echoing their joyous strains.

Refrain

Gloria, in excelsis Deo!
Gloria, in excelsis Deo!

Shepherds, why this jubilee?
Why your joyous strains prolong?
What the gladsome tidings be
Which inspire your heavenly song?

Refrain

Come to Bethlehem and see
Christ Whose birth the angels sing;
Come, adore on bended knee,
Christ the Lord, the newborn King.

Refrain

See Him in a manger laid,
Whom the choirs of angels praise;
Mary, Joseph, lend your aid,
While our hearts in love we raise.

Refrain

Happy Birthday, Big Sister!

2009-12-08T07:31:00.002-05:00

I'm going to a birthday party for big sister! I just got an email from her mom that they're having a small celebration on Sunday!

I can't express how excited I am! I also can't believe big sister will be five years old! She was little more than a baby -- just barely 2 years old -- when I was hired as a nanny for her and her infant twin brothers.

I'm pretty sure I now what I'm going to give her--I've had my eye on a couple of potential gifts for a while now -- wanting to give just the right "Mary gift." I want my gift to be memorable and fun and yes, durable! I want it to be something that when she opens it, she'll know it was from me! I'm the crafty, puzzle working, song singing, dancing to music, silly, no-nonsense-let's not forget whose the boss, sidewalk chalk drawing, bubble blowing Mary!

Yes, it is important to me to be thought of in certain ways. It has occurred to me, though, that I have not spent as much time and energy this year focusing on the one true important birth that will be celebrated in a few days. I haven't prayed about who I am to God--how He views me and my life. Only just this morning have I spent time in prayer and quiet reflection about whether or not my life is a "perfect gift" to God.

Sadly, the answer is no! I rejoice though that I have at least realized my folly and have committed to some serious soul-searching and prayer for the remainder of this holiday season and into the new year. I rejoice too that no matter what gift I give big sister, she will like it because it is from Mary.

God wants the kind of planning and thought--and excitement--that I have about big sister's birthday party when we offer our lives to Him. He already gave us the perfect gift--our goal to is express our thanks by living our lives in such a way that we become an acceptable gift to Him. I rejoice that while I will never be perfect, I worship a perfect God who loves me in spite of that truth!

My way or God's way?

2009-11-30T07:04:00.005-05:00

On my last visit with my little buddies, God revealed several lessons to me--as He always does through the children in my life! This one is especially poignant, I think.

Last year - either for Christmas or for a birthday, I gave the boys two DVD's. One was of trucks-neither of them is spectacular, I don't think, but I bought them on-line and they like them - well one of the twins LOVES them! He's a truck fanatic--loves anything truck-related. Another thing the twins love is watching videos with Mary:-) Part of our new routine when I babysit is to watch all the videos we used to watch every day when I was their nanny.

Now that I only see the children every few weeks, our times together are especially precious - to them and to me. It had been at least 6 weeks since my last visit and in that time mom and dad got a new remote control because they changed cable service. Those who know me well already know where this is going. You see, while I can figure out quite a bit about blogging, HTML code, and on-line "anything" I am like a complete idiot when it comes to all things electronic. If you can't just push the "on" button and have everything work as it's supposed to, I'm lost.

Well, after dinner was eaten, hands and faces washed and puzzles worked on the floor together, the children decided they wanted to watch some movies. Of course the "truck twin" immediately announced he wanted to watch the truck movie. We got it out and placed it in the DVD player and then . . . yikes . . . I don't even know what button to push next . . . this new remote is similar to the other one, but even pushing the buttons labeled like those on the old remote, in what I thought was the same order, I could not for the life of me get the thing to play on the television.

After about 10 minutes, big sister offered, "Here, just give it to me and I'll push all the buttons." No thank you, sister! I can mess up the remote and/or electronics all by myself! LOL! Both boys "worked on" the DVD player. One brother pressed open/close and the other brother took out the DVD, replaced it in to the player and pressed the button again. Then they tried the "play" button several times. (I was quite impressed with their teamwork, but had visions of what that might look like when their 12 and want to do something they're not supposed to do:-) All the while, I'm suggesting they stop pushing buttons so I could try to see if any of the combinations I'm using to unlock the secret code to play the DVD is working.

After about 10 more minutes, I gave up and announced that the remote was "broken" and that I would figure out how to work it so we would have to watch the movie next time. But truck-twin was not to be deterred. He took out the DVD and brought it to me, "see Mary, it's this one," and "It works, I put it in." This went on for about 30 minutes - and I counted how many times a little boy, determined to watch a truck DVD with Mary can actually press the open/close button, take out the disk and put it back in - I told his mom, I was pretty sure it was about 75-80 times!

You know, I didn't get upset with my little buddy though, and I let him continue to push those buttons and work on the problem. He didn't want to hear that something so important to him was just not going to happen this time. He didn't understand that it wasn't about what he wanted -- or even what I wanted. It was about the circumstances in which we found ourselves.

I thought about how much like my little truck-loving twin I am when I take my requests to God sometimes. Even after it is abundantly clear to me that a plan I had made or a path I had chosen is not going to work out, I just keep at it. Sometimes, as sister suggested, I just "push all the buttons" in a last ditch effort to get my way. Sometimes, like my little buddy, I don't get mad or even rail at God--I just keep . . . doing . . . what . . . I . . . was . . . doing . . .

In the end my buddy resolved himself to not being able to watch the movie and we found an acceptable alternative program on television (thank goodness for cable television!) But the lesson of that night is not lost on me. Since that night, I've been praying a lot about some things that aren't really working the way I would like them to. I'm asking God to show me whether I am to persevere and keep at it, or whether I need to turn these situations over to him and allow Him to show me a better way.

"Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long" (Psalm 25:4-5 NIV).

Clap Your Hands

2009-11-21T22:10:00.003-05:00

Oh my! I was long overdue for my "big sister" and "little buddy" fix! Yep, I spent 4 wonderful hours this evening with the children I nannied for two years. Big sister will be 5 (on December 14 as she informed me tonight) and the twin boys will be 3 in January! Oh my goodness I was so happy to see them!

They were excited too, which was wonderful! The boys ran off the porch and into the yard to greet me! I got so many hugs and all three of the kids talking at once, wanting to tell me everything going on in their lives! At one point this evening when we were sitting on the couch watching a show, one of the boys told me, "I missed you, Mary." My heart was full to overflowing at that moment! Both boys wanted to sit on my lap and be near me the entire evening. Big sister is SO big and smart and very busy telling brothers what to do!

I had had a long, long, stressful, tiring, exhausting week at work. I really needed this unbounded, overflowing, joyous time with three children I spent 5 days a week with for 2 years. The boys were only 8 weeks old when I started caring for them. And sister was 2 when we sat on the back balcony of the apartment they lived in while Mom and Dad looked for a house in Richmond, blowing bubbles and starting with potty training.

I needed to be loved on and to be in the presence of those three little ones who just could not restrain their glee and excitement at seeing me. This is how God expects us to approach Him as well! And when you think about it, it is exactly how we should be any time we go to Him in prayer.

No matter what we're going through in our lives; no matter what we're struggling with; no matter how tired or frustrated, beaten down or worn out we may feel, we need to run to God with joy and celebration because we've been promised a place with Him in heaven someday!

Don't wait at the door - run off the porch and into the yard! Leap into His arms! Clap your hands and squeal with glee! We have eternal life already guaranteed! That's something about which to be overflowing with excitement and celebration!

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice" (Philippians 4:4 NIV)

Join me in the journey!

2009-11-15T19:40:00.011-05:00

I've just started a second column at Examiner.com, Richmond Working Moms. My "other" column is the Richmond Frugal Family. I hope you'll take a few minutes to stop by. Subscribe to either or both, if you like, so you don't miss any great ideas, tips or suggestions!

These two columns are really ideally suited for me! I consider frugality a spiritual discipline and I strive always to support and encourage other moms in their parenting journey. Times are hard, money is tight, and being a parent is never easy! I'm quite excited to minister in two different venues to parents, and especially moms, of children of all ages and stages.

I've also been given a HUGE vision by God in the last week about the next big thing in my life. I'm not ready to share it yet, but suffice it to say, I am really blown away. I am in continual prayer, and God has sent several folks across my path to affirm and confirm that I am hearing Him correctly! As a woman who believes ardently in the power of prayer, I covet any and all you care to offer up on behalf of this ministry. I will be sharing it with my readers - and the world! - very soon!

I've been revamping this site and trying to find suitable music that reflects the tone I want to convey. If you have a particularly favorite song that makes you feel glad to be an adult living a world full of children, please leave me a comment! I'll consider adding it to the play list.

I also would appreciate your stopping by God's Wonder Woman where I invite readers to share the journey toward capturing the divinely-designed image of ourselves as God's beloved daughters. I publish there twice a month and have been blessed beyond words to share my own journey.

What is going on in your life? Leave me a comment. Are you in need of prayer? Visit my Divinely Designed Blog and register your confidential prayer request HERE.

Finally . . . where are you from? Find out where I'm from at Godly Graffiti.

Come back often! There's always something going on! Join me in the journey!

Blessings!
Mary

Let's Go Krogering - November 3

2009-11-03T20:36:00.005-05:00

Light shopping week as the cabinets are full and we only needed a few items this week. Plus we'll be getting our Angel Food Order on Saturday, so we didn't much from Kroger.

10 Item Mega Event purchases:

3 Steamfresh Vegetables $1.99/ea - used 3 0.50 coupons (each doubled) - 2 electronic coupons, 1 from 10/18 Smart Source
2 - Ball Park Meat Franks - .99 ea. when you buy 2 plus $1.00/2 from 10/18 Red Plum
2 - Orbit gum - 0.41 each (when you buy 10 mega event items)
3 2-liter - Coke products - 0.79 ea

Some other good deals: My Kroger also had Michelina entrees for 0.79 cents; Weight Watcher string cheese - 0.30 off plus I used 0.75 coupon from coupons.com; bought a Hawaiian Private Selection Pizza (jumbo size!) for $6.99

Mfg. Coupons Savings: $4.75
Bonus Coupon Savings: $2.00
Kroger Plus Savings: $24.28
Total Coupons: $31.03
Senior discount (5%): $3.66; bag buy back: 0.25 (@ 0.05 ea.)
Total Savings ($31.03+3.66+0.25) $34.94 or 36%

My sales receipt also announced that Kroger is having another special promotion beginning soon! Spend $500 between 11/15 and 12/12 and earn one 10% of total order from 12/27 - 1/9/2010!

"JUST" A Mom

2009-10-27T12:49:00.004-04:00

I don't title this post lightly. This issue has been bouncing around in my head for a while and I've shared it with a couple of friends who have affirmed that I'm on the right track. (Of course, I realize we often pick friends who are like-minded.)

A little background: My children are now 24 (daughter, married for 2 years) and 21 (son). When I became a mom, I knew I was 'meant to' be one! I have loved every minute of being mom to Jen and Jeff. No they weren't perfect kids -- but pretty close. We didn't have a lot of problems that many of their peers experienced. We were (and remain) very fortunate.

To claim no credit at all for how well our children turned out would just be insincere and disengenuous. I tried very hard to be a wonderful mother--not just a good mom--a wonderful mother! I know I fell far short of that ideal many, many times. But somehow, my children knew that was my goal and ardent desire, and they forgave me for not always rising to the ocassion, and savored the common knowledge that they were that important to me - and that 'getting it right' meant so much to me. They got that they mattered.

Getting to the point here. My daughter is a beautiful, bright, incredible young woman with multiple gifts and graces. My son is a handsome, strong, incredible young man with multiple gifts and graces. My son also has Asperger's Syndrome (very high end of the autism spectrum). We didn't always know what the diagnosis was, but we knew very early on what his challenges would probably be. We also, though, recognized early on what challenges our daughter would probably have (based on her personality and dispositon).

We never identified our son as being "special needs" because of his diagnosis. Not because we were in denial but because we don't make that kind of distinction in life. All children have 'special needs' regardless of where they fall on any spectrum, chart or yardstick for measuring their development. Some have more challenges, larger obstacles, fewer resources. All have needs that are unique and specific to them.

We've never identified Jeff as our "special needs" son. Nor have we ever identified him by the sports he participated in, the instruments he played or the fact that he read (and undersood) college-level reading material when he was in 5th grade or by his gentle spirit and deep faith.

But then we never identified Jennifer as our "exceptionally bright" daughter, either. Nor have we identified her by the sports she participated in, the excellent GPA she maintained throughout school, or by her beauty--inside and out.

That's because ALL children are special! I don't want to be pigeon-holed as a parent of a XXXX child. I want to be a mom--just a mom. My children are amazing human beings and I am proud to call them both my friends. I am humbled that God gave them to me and entrusted their care and nurturing to my husband and me. We have been in awe of them since the moment they were conceived. We continue to be in awe of the incredible human beings they have become and continue to grow into.

In the world too many things drive us apart and the mentality of "divide and conquer" and one-upsmanship seems to run rampant. I choose to be just a mom who can understand and empathize with other moms who want what is best for their children. I have tried never to judge other women for their parenting (or lack thereof) because I know there were times I dove into uncharted waters and stayed afloat only because of God's grace.

That's the message that I hope resonates for others when they hear me speak or read what I write: God's grace is the common thread for all of us. It's okay that we weren't (aren't) strong enough, smart enough, rich enough, young or old enough on our own to be the kind of mom (or person) we want to be. God's grace is enough--it makes us enough. It makes our 'best shot' at everything we do enough.

My husband and I have never doubted divine intervention and guidance in our parenting or in our lives. We fully accept, acknowledge and are ever grateful for it and invite it into our lives on an on-going basis.

So next time you think you're "just" a mom, smile! Next time somebody identifies you as "just" a mom, say 'Thank you!" It's a great thing to be!

"By faith Moses' parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king's edict" (Hebrews 11:23 NIV).

"These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads" (Deuteronomy 6:6-8 NIV).

"he said to them, "Take to heart all the words I have solemnly declared to you this day, so that you may command your children to obey carefully all the words of this law" (Deuteronomy 32:46 NIV).

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth"(3 John 1:4 NIV).

Tough Love Sprinkled With Grace

2009-10-09T07:14:00.005-04:00

The last time I babysat for the my little buddies was different than previous visits in that the boys, being in the year between 2-3 are learning and growing and blossoming by leaps and bounds! Big sister is also developing that incredible little brain of hers - she's just not as "out there" as the boys. She's quieter and you can almost see the gears turning in her head behind those beautiful blue eyes:-)

Sister didn't want to go to bed. I told her if she settled down and helped the boys settle down during a short video, she could stay up a few minutes later than the "babies." For 30 minutes I had to remind and redirect her as she continually engaged the boys in "dancing" and running around during the video.

I made the mistake of yielding to her request, even though she ignored my previous repeated instructions to settle down, sit down, and not get brothers riled up so they would go to bed easily. (They did anyway, thankfully.)

Sister and I worked a puzzle (twice) and she clearly grasped the "hints" I had given her on the first go-round about edge pieces and matching up pieces with the same colors in the them. But then it was bed time. She didn't want to go to bed (by this time she was overly tired). She didn't want me to leave her without reading several books (we had already agreed that if I let her stay up, she would go straight to bed without the usual routine because it was so late).

She was having none of it! She was not a happy camper. I am, however, a "seasoned" parent and pretty much a no-nonsense person when it comes to establishing who is in charge (kids vs. adults). Eventually, she wore herself out and fell asleep.

Where am I going with this? Well, big sister reminds me a great deal of myself when God doesn't "comply with my wishes." I can become pretty hard-headed and complain, then start to get upset, then yell and rail at God until I ultimately just relent and let Him "win."

I held up my end of the deal, big sister did not. We both knew the rules going in, but big sister didn't like the rules, once it was time to abide by them. Even though I felt sorry for sister, after she had worked herself up into a pretty big fit, I continued to remind her of our agreement.

I went up to her room several times to assure her I was still hearing her (hard not to!:-) and she carried on with a great deal of histrionics, that I knew were only making her more upset. But I had to abide by my end of the deal--I had to stick by my guns or the next time she would push the limits even more and act up/act out to a far greater degree. I felt sorry for her, but I love her too much to have yielded.

I'm sure God feels as I did that evening: sad that I am unhappy, even knowing He is being just. God always keeps "His end of the agreement." I'm the one who protests, fails to cooperate, and ultimately work myself into a fit when He doesn't yield!

I'm so glad He is a just and unyielding God! The world needs that kind of unwavering justice and love. I need that kind of fairness and certainty that I will receive His love even when I haven't earned it and especially when I don't deserve it.

I'm glad God loves me enough to always exercise "tough love" sprinkled with mercy and grace.

"Come, my children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the LORD" (Psalm 34:11 NIV).

"what we have heard and known, what our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power, and the wonders he has done. He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which he commanded our forefathers to teach their children," (Psalm 78:3-5 NIV)

Transitions and Growing Up With Asperger Syndrome

2009-10-04T09:37:00.005-04:00

Our son has graduated from the Woodrow Wilson Rehabilitation Center's Work Readiness Program with a Certificate in Materials Management (just like a certificate from the community college) . He far exceeded the expectations of the program and we are thrilled for him! We are doubly blessed because before he even graduated we received a call from his local case worker that he was eligible to participate in a 1-year grant program through a collaboration of VCU and Dept. of Rehab. Services!

He has been assigned a job coach who has already met with all of us and then with him once individually. We emailed her the resume we had developed and she combined that information with his experience and training over the past 9 months through his program at Woodrow Wilson.

On Monday they will meet again and she will assist him in completing on-line applications for jobs she has already identified. She will also conduct mock interviews with him and even attend interviews if he desires.

Since he's back home, I'm needing to get busy finally and help him find ways to transition from high school, to young adulthood. He is struggling, but knows it it important. I'm going to suggest he reactivate the blog he started in high school and share his journey as a way to process and also to help other older teens and young adults navigating the waters of this challenging life transition.

I've shared here some resources I have explored in the past and will revisit in the weeks ahead. I hope this information is beneficial. Please feel free to leave a comment regarding both on-line and print resources as well as any local groups you know of. (Please indicate your City)

Asperger's Syndrome Resources - Great list of websites and books

Wrong Planet.net - the only social networking site for individuals (and their parents) on the Autism spectrum.

Autism Society of Americ a - News, headlines and resources for "all things Autism"

Autism Speaks - Information about Autism, activities for raising awareness (and money), advocating for individuals with Autism

Autistic and Health y - Education, nutrition, studies, resources and consulting

Local Member in the News - A local (Richmond, VA) member of Autism Speaks shares his story

New Theories of Autism/Asperger Syndrome - New York Times article about some ground-breaking research and news.

Blessings on your journey,
Mary

Let's Go Krogering - Week #3

2009-09-15T20:27:00.002-04:00

I was feeling under the weather this evening so my wonderful husband made a quick Kroger run by himself. He did very well, too! His overall savings = 46%!

We didn't need too much this week as we've been stocking up and there are only the two of us at home till our son graduates and moves back home at the end of the month. We made up a list of the Buy 10 items get $5 off at register promotional items and then matched up Kroger store coupons and other coupons.
Here's how it worked out:

All the following were on sale and part of the Buy 10/$5 off promotion:

Deer Park Drinking Water (1)
Skinny Cow Ice Cream (2)
Philly soft cream cheese (2) Coupon for $1.00/2
Kraft Cheese slices (1)(Coupon for $.55)
Oreo Cookies (4) Used 2 coupons for each for $1/2
Oscar Mayer Bacon (1)

Then he used a $1.00 off coupon on Hormel Beef Tips dinner.

Mfg Coupon Savings: $4.55
Bonus KFT NESTLE Savings: $5.00
Kroger Plus Savings: $18.43
Plus 5% senior discount: $1.97

Grocery Sub total: $63.92
Total savings: $29.95
Spent:$33.97

To date, we've accumulated $183.30 of qualifying purchases toward the "Spend $400 and earn 10% off total order" and currently have 147 Fuel Saver Points (100 pts. - 10 cents off/gallon of Kroger gas).

What was your Kroger experience this week?

If you would like to read more Kroger frugal shopping stories and learn how to maximize your "Kroger experience," hop on over to Marianne Thomas', blog, The New Frugal Mom.

Don't forget to stop by Richmond Frugal Family for tips on how to live frugally and thrive!

God Rejoices In Our Progress

2009-09-11T07:28:00.004-04:00

This evening I'll be visiting my little buddies! To say I'm excited is an understatement!

I miss these children so much now that I only visit about once a month! The other night we stopped by their home to pick up something from mom and dad. Mom told us the kids very excitedly asked them if they were going out! That warmed my heart:-)

It's been a full, somewhat stressful week. I typically look forward to Friday nights these days as a chance to relax, unwind, and have quiet time alone. My husband currently works on Friday evenings. Tonight though, I will benefit from the energy and abandon that is contagious in the presence of children.

I imagine God delights in us in the same way! When we run to Him and throw our arms around Him, His heart is warmed, just as mine is every time I see my little buddies.

I think that just as I delight in seeing the progress the boys have made - they're in big boy beds now - and share in the newly acquired reading and conversation skills of big sister, God delights in our progress too.

Each baby step we take toward Him is a reason to rejoice! He loves us so much! I'm sure I'll have an update over the weekend:-)

Let's Go Krogering - Week #2

2009-09-08T21:11:00.004-04:00

This week we didn't need too much, but decided to stock up on some items that were on special. Our subtotal was $181.39.

We bought 3 packs of Keebler cookies (on sale) and received a free gallon of Kroger milk ($2.39) value)
Then we received $6.03 as our senior discount and .$35 for our bag buy back.

Best deals I found this week were in the 10/$10 deals that I combined with coupons:
Michelena Frozen Entrees - 10/$10 - I used a $1.00/5 for a total of .$80 ea.
(I eat these for lunch at work)
Chef Boyardee Canned & Microwave Pasta 10/$10 - had 1 coupon for $1.00/5 and one for $.35/3 (my son loves these and he'll be graduating at the end of the month and moving home:-)
Weight Watcher String Cheese $2.51 - I had a coupon for $1/1

Our household (probably everybody's:-) has been selected for a special promotion: $spend $400 form 9/6-10/3 and earn one 10% off total order form 10/6-10/17. After our trip tonight, be have $123.33 of qualifying purchases toward our total. (This promotion is actually one of the reasons we stocked upon on some 10/$10 items this trip)

Bottom line: $118.52 Saved: $54.17 (a little over 31%) Not as good as last week, but still not too shabby.

If you would like to read more Kroger frugal shopping stories and learn how to maximize your "Kroger experience," hop on over to Marianne Thomas', blog, The New Frugal Mom.

Don't forget to stop by Richmond Frugal Family for tips on how to live frugally and thrive!

A Break From Tradition: Let's Go Krogering!

2009-09-01T21:08:00.006-04:00

I've decided to start participating in the Tuesday meme: Let's Go Krogering! I really love Kroger and we do our grocery shopping almost exclusively at Kroger. Because my dear husband is now eligible for the {senior} discount on Tuesdays, we shop on Tuesdays - yes, it's our "old married couple" weeknight date night:-)

I keep my eyes open for good deals elsewhere, but between the great pharmacist at our neighborhood store, the 2 Prescriptions = 10 cents off per gallon gas; $100 spent = 10 cents off per gas; the great prices and in-store specials and the fact that they double coupons up to 50 cents . . . well . . .

Here's my first post. If you would like to read more Kroger frugal shopping stories and learn how to maximize your "Kroger experience," hop on over to Marianne Thomas', blog, The New Frugal Mom.

If you'd like to learn some of my great tips for Frugal Families, visit my Richmond Frugal Family column at examiner.com.

*********LET'S GO KROGERING STARTS HERE*********

Tonight our total was: $133.61
Less 5 cloth bags: $.25 bag buyback
We got 1 free gallon of milk for buying 3 participating Keebler/Kellog Items - $2.49 savings
Less: 5% senior discount $5.11
Less: Mfg Coupons $16.40
Less: Bonus Coupon Savings $.035
Less: Kroger Plus Savings: $33.87
PLUS: $10 rebate from Kellogs for purchasing 10 participating items in one transaction.

Here's the bottom line: $133.61 - 2.49(milk) - $.25 bag buy back - $5.11 senior discount - $50.62 (coupons/Kroger plus savings) - $10 rebate for a grand total of $72.99 spent after rebate

Saved: $60.62 or 45% - That's my best trip yet! I'm shooting for 50% or better every trip, so stay tuned!

A "Magic Touch"

2009-08-24T07:12:00.005-04:00

My sister-in-law, N, called yesterday afternoon to say she and her two youngest children were popping down to Richmond for the afternoon (they live bout 45 minutes away). It was an unexpected surprise and I was so grateful that this was one of those rare weekends with nothing on our schedule except what we felt like doing.

I still remember the year I helped my sister-in-law fix her hair for prom when she was in high school. Later, my daughter, 3 years old at the time, was a flower girl in her wedding. Even then N had a 'magic touch' with children as my daughter was not 'going along with the program' when it came time to walk down the aisle and N whispered some "magic words" to get her on track. To this day I don't know what N said to her, nor probably does either one of them remember, but Jen pulled it off like a pro!

It's been no great surprise then, that N has large family. She is a natural with children and I admire the way she and her husband have reared their boys (oldest one a freshman in college, youngest one in 7th grade) . . . and their precious daughter - 3 years old:-) The boys are polite and respectful (to us and to others). I'm sure they're typical siblings/children within the confines of their home:-) I'm a mom--I get that!

The thing I admire the most is how they have honored and allowed to develop each of their boys' individuality. They are as different as can be - one from the other. It's kind of ironic to me that N had four boys, and yet God prepared her for a house full of testosterone, because she has two older brothers - one 8 years older and one 10 years older. She was uniquely equipped in her childhood to parent all those boys!

We sat on the deck for a while, then moved inside when it got too hot. We talked about the pictures I have displayed in our living room and shared the memories of the events captured in many of the shots. It was such a sweet opportunity to share our family history with her children and pass on the stories of our shared life.

This morning I'm wondering where all those years have gone. I'm rejoicing, too, that we have had such full lives! She and we are truly blessed to have each other and our children and our memories to share.

The lyrics to one of Cat Steven's songs implore, "Teach your children well . . ." The Bible offers the same advice.

"Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them" (Deuteronomy 4:9 NIV).

"Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates" (Deuteronomy 20:18-20 NIV)

Thoughts on a Daughter Leaving Home

2009-08-19T20:59:00.002-04:00

I wrote this six years ago as our daughter was preparing to leave for George Mason University. I pray you will be blessed by my sharing.

Desperation, Deliverance and other words that start with “D”

“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Selah” (Psalm 62:8 NIV)

Desperation. Our oldest child, our only daughter, my friend, my sister, my heart will be leaving for college soon. It occurred to me in the wee hours of this morning that our family will be forever diminished by her absence. We have watched her foray out for a day trip here and there – a few hours at the beach; a few days keeping a house-sitting friend company – but never before have we had to prepare for her long term and ultimately permanent absence. Oh, she’ll be home for an occasional weekend. She’ll come home for winter break. But she won’t really be coming home. She’ll be coming to the place that used to be her life. Our home will soon become the place she visits while she’s waiting for the rest of her life.

And I am desperate. Desperate to tell her everything she will need to know to live without us. Desperate to keep her from the pain and sadness that is inevitably intermingled with success and joy from living in the world. Desperate to somehow impart the absolute and boundless love, admiration, pride and respect we have for her not only as our daughter, but as a fellow human being on this earth. Our loss as a nuclear family is the world’s gain—a strong, beautiful, brilliant and good member of the world community has sprung forth! And I am desperately grieving her impending departure.

I know that this kind of desperation is sinful. It demonstrates my lack of trust that God will enfold her with his love and protection. It proves that while I know He will always be with her to help her deal with the disappointments as well as the victories, I lack the will to allow Him alone to play that role. It shows my lack of confidence in myself and the job I did as a parent, mother, friend to my precious daughter. It is a desperation born of fear.

How can I reconcile this face of desperation with my belief that God is a good and loving God? How do I proceed from this point on, confident that God will continue to be, not only in the margins but at the core of my daughter’s life – and mine! My prayers for her safety and care continue to be lifted on high. My grief is over losing a part of me and my life that has been not only the margins, but the core. She will thrive. She will fall down. She will love and live and grow into the extraordinary human being that only God can envision. My hesitancy is only because I love her so much.

Perhaps sin is too strong a word? But my lack of confidence is not in her. Or in God. Not really. It is in the world. My desperation reminds me how absolutely and completely we must all rely on God to get us through the transitions in our lives. He is at the heart of every milestone, joyous or sad. He is the heart of every day of our lives.

My desperation reveals a stumbling block in my faith life. But mostly, it reveals how desperately I seek the face of God. How I long to know the answers to the burning questions I pose to Him every day in my prayers. Desperate to know my child will grow into the woman He has planned for her to become. Desperate to believe that I have done the best I could to help her on that journey.

And while I am certain it is not enough—has never been enough—I trust that God was there to fill in the margins when I was not wise enough or strong enough to do what needed to be done.

Post Script: 6 years later, our daughter is now 24 years old and a graduate of George Mason University. She has been happily married for 2 years to a wonderful young man we instantly considered our son.While we wish she and husband lived here in town, we're thrilled they are a mere 1.5 hrs away and we see them often.

Shopping is Love

2009-08-15T17:23:00.004-04:00

This is not the title I had planned for this post, but when I found this picture online, I realized that yes, sometimes shopping is love. If you have a daughter you can especially understand how this can be so. But wait, I'm not talking about spending money (well that is involved, but that's not my point!)

I have recently made some important lifestyle changes, not the least of which includes eating healthfully, exercising and losing weight. My daughter, now in her 20's, has been an inspiration to me in this arena (and many others). She is beautiful and smart and yes, has matured into a woman I am glad to call my friend. I have recently lost 30 lbs. and so have had to buy some new clothes -- I really am talking NEED, not just want. She and I went out shopping this afternoon and I thought over and over "I am so blessed to have my daughter."

I am blessed, first to be her mom. Since the day she was born, we have had a connection that goes beyond mother and daughter. We are kindred spirits in so many ways -- like me, she was born an "old soul" and so we have pretty much "gotten each other" from the day she was born. She was not a perfect child, but I have no real complaints. I wasn't a perfect mom either, and she hasn't expressed too many issues about which I marred her for life:-)

Now, rewind about 10 years and I might have had a few complaints. I have memories that until today, were more vivid than I had thought I would want them to be. Picture this: A 13 year old girl and her best friend + back-to-school shopping + fitting room with not enough stalls + hundreds of other moms and teenage girls packed into a department store Jr.'s department.

I have memories of standing outside the dressing room, serving as a human clothes rack while pants, shirts, skirts, t-shirts and jeans were tried on, rejected, returned to me to go back to the rack and begin the process all over again in search of smaller, larger or different color clothing items. I'm talking hours. I don't think I complained about it a lot. I was a pretty patient mom, who may not have savored moments like those, but accepted that it went with the territory.

As I reflected back on those times this afternoon, a flood of other memories rushed back as well. I'm at a point in my life where I just don't know how much more blessed I can possibly feel. Yet, each day God reveals another blessing. Today, my daughter and I changed roles. She was the human clothes rack, making countless trips back and forth in search of a different size, style, color for her mom! She also provided me a tutorial on "never wear this" and "don't even think about buying something like that", as we breezed past racks of clothes until we found some style and fit that was at least acceptable:-) for me to try on. She was equally as patient as I recall being. She was even magnanimous - something I may not have achieved back then.

Full circle is what I was going for when I sat down to type this post - maybe even along the lines of the Circle of Life from the Lion King. My daughter can shop! She can dress, too! My daughter's pretty amazing and today I felt especially blessed to be her friend.

Not to mention that I have the beginnings of a brand new wardrobe - all of which was purchased from sales racks -- and using a store-ad coupon! That's my girl!!

"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth" (1 John 3:18 NIV).

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth" (3 John 1:4 NIV).

"[Children and Parents ] Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right" (Ephesians 6:1 NIV)

Rejoice and Be Glad in Him

2009-07-31T07:25:00.004-04:00

Last night I had the joy of babysitting for the twins and their big sister. Oh what fun! They were quite excited to see me, which warmed my heart! All three of them started chattering away about what was going on in their lives.

The boys decided they were done with dinner because they wanted to get down from the table and play with me! Big sister wanted to go outside. One brother was barefoot so he needed to put on his shoes while the other one wolfed down the remainder of his fish sticks. It was just like "old times."

Because of their age, the boys looked so much older than the last time I saw them--about 6 weeks ago! They are moving from the baby stage to the toddler stage. Sister is as smart as ever! I delighted in every word and action of all three of the children. My favorite activity last night was sitting under the "playground" while the children ate popsicles. (Under the platform/playhouse at the top of the play set is a picnic table with benches where we sat for popsicle eating.) We had a detailed discussion about the colors of each popsicle and about the wonderful play set with swings, slide, "rock wall" and various other fun features.

As I played and hugged and kissed them throughout the night, I thought about how God must feel when we go to him in prayer, confession and gratitude--for just about any reason at all. I know He must smile when we lift a word of praise, when we ask for His forgiveness or when we simply spend quiet time reflecting on His word. I know He adores us even more than I adore my little buddies. I know He misses us when we separate ourselves from Him, even more than I miss the children.

God rejoices in us. We are His beloved! He created a world specifically and perfectly designed not only to sustain our lives, but to allow us to flourish and thrive. Then He sent His Son to demonstrate His ultimate gift to mankind: grace.

"But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who love your salvation always say, "Let God be exalted!" (Psalm 70:4 NIV)

"But be glad and rejoice forever in what I will create, for I will create Jerusalem to be a delight and its people a joy" (Isaiah 65:18 NIV).

"The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing" (Zephaniah 3:17 NIV).

Thank you for your prayers!

2009-07-21T20:13:00.000-04:00

Many thanks to Andrea for her rallying prayer warriors from around the world to intercede on our behalf!

Well, 3 days and much stress, worry and concern later, I brought Jim home this afternoon! He spent 13 hours in the ER before the cardiologist released him to a room in the Heart Pavilion. There was only one minor episode on Sunday night where the nurse gave Jim nitroglycerin because he complained of some rather painful pressure in his chest. Since then -- nothing!

Jim has had what one of the technicians at the hospital dubbed "the million dollar workup"!!! In other words, they did just about every logical test they could do without him undergoing any invasive procedures. (We're pretty sure that tech isn't too far off on the cost, either!:-)

The doctors are baffled because every test was negative -- multiple blood work-ups, chest x-ray, echo-cardiogram, ultrasound, stress test, full body scan, upper G.I. & esophageal something - all negative. And yet, on two occasions when he experienced chest pain/pressure, he responded to nitroglycerin.

We tend to believe that the prayers of the faithful led God to heal him. That is our ardent hope and the hope that we cling to. God is so good to have placed so many faithful prayer warriors in our lives -- and around the world! We felt your prayers and love every moment during our ordeal and thank you more than we can ever express.

We do ask for continued prayer that Jim not experience any more episodes like this.

I don't think all of it has really hit me yet, but I am certain in the days and weeks ahead there will be much about which to write and share.

Until then, blessings on your journey.

"Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much" (James 5:16 NKJV)

"pray without ceasing" (1 Thessalonians 5:17 NKJV)

URGENT PRAYER REQUEST

2009-07-19T17:12:00.003-04:00

Hi, my name is Andrea from Arise 2 Write and All Gods Creatures. I am a friend of Mary's.

Mary called last night to ask for prayer. Her husband Jim was admitted to the hospital shortly after 3:00 A.M. Saturday morning with a Cardiac Episode. He is stable, now. He will have more tests done on Monday morning.

Both Mary and Jim are prayer warriors and believe in the power of prayer. Please storm the heavens on their behalf.

Please visit Edie at Rich gifts to pick up a button to place on your sidebar to pray for Jim. Edie is a dear friend, too. Edie graciously made this button without being asked. Thank you, Edie!

Please leave a message for Mary. Let her know you are praying for her.

In HIS grip,

Andrea

Who Are You Imitating?

2009-07-16T06:37:00.005-04:00

"Hello, jabber, jabber, jabber." This was the "conversation" that went on often at the house where my little buddies live. They imagined just about anything was a cell phone - like mom and dad have. At one point I purchased them each a phone at the grocery store. They made a ringing sound, and "talked" depending upon which button was pushed.

Even as young as 20 months, I can remember the boys, "phone" to their ear, shoulder to the phone, walking around the family room, "talking" as I'm sure mom did - phone held in place via ear and shoulder so two hands would be free at all times. It made me chuckle every time they did it. And of course, if one of the boys had a phone, I immediately needed to help the other find one in the toy bin! As they got older, I could swear sometimes even the boys sounded like their mom did on the phone - same inflection in the voice and everything!

Children live what they learn. They imitate others in their lives. But you know, so do adults. By the time we reach adulthood we have learned quite a bit - and not all of it is good. It can be challenging to break free from the undesirable learned behaviors we have developed. It can be painful to recognize that the people in our lives who we look to as examples, mentors, friends may not model the kind of behavior and attitude we know is appropriate for Christians.

Paul urges us, "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children" (Ephesians 5:1 NIV). That means we are also to set a Godly example for the children in our lives and for everyone else as well. It's not always easy, but we have a Savior who bore all our burdens for us. He will give us the wisdom and the courage to break free of undesirable behaviors and attitudes.

"If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen" (1 Peter 4:11 NIV).

"I can do everything through him who gives me strength" (Philippians 4:13 NIV).

July 4th, Easter Baskets and Christmas Morning

2009-07-03T18:30:00.005-04:00

I remember when I was about 9 or 10. My grandmother (paternal) used to make us all matching outfits for various holidays. I assume this memory is of July 4th, because we lived in Massachusetts that year and it didn't even get really warm until about July (Memorial Day was probably still a bit chilly).

I don't know why I remember this year in particular but my three younger sisters and I all wore blue and white striped seersucker jumpers (there was some red rick-rack, I think) and my brother had some type of little outfit to match. I have a copy of a picture somewhere of all of us in those outfits. I remember thinking I looked so pretty! I thought we all looked so great! The little outfits were sewn with love and care. They represented my grandmother's love to me.

Some of my favorite photos from my childhood are those where we all "went together." I don't know how my mom did it, but more often than not, we looked clean, combed and dressed impeccably in coordinating, matching, or "go together" clothes -- no small feat for a mom with for four young girls and baby boy.

I think of those outfits every year on July 4th. I remember so much about that house and the wonderful basement where my sisters and I played for hours! I remember the room my dad built from the ground up so he would have office space to work in. I didn't realize at the time that all parents aren't that intentional and devoted to their children. They aren't all handy and able to make do and often even "make something wonderful out of nothing."

My parents did that for us. They set the bar pretty high! They were far from perfect. But I like to think I received from them the best of both of them. All the things in me that are creative, handy, resourceful, passionate and compassionate came from them. I know July 4th is an odd time to honor one's parents. But fireworks, trick or treating, Easter baskets and Christmas mornings are all tied up together in my mind and my heart, especially the older I get.

So I am blessed to have had parents who God hand-picked for me. He brought them together so that I and my sisters and brother would have exactly the skills, talents, gifts and graces God planned for us to have. Then he gave us their presence and their love so that as we grew up we would become the best of each of them and the best of them as a couple.

There were some things in my childhood that I didn't enjoy. But as I've grown in my faith and in my ardent desire to surrender more and more of my life to Christ, those memories fade. As I learn about forgiveness - of others and especially of myself - I am able to "forget" the pain and unpleasantness, though not the lesson.

The other night I heard Dr. Wayne Dyer make a statement that strikes me as so profound I can't stop thinking about it. It applies to our childhoods, to our parenting, to our jobs, to every aspect of our lives: "Everything that has happened to you was supposed to happen. How do we know that's true? Because it happened!"

So today as the sun sets on this July 3 I rejoice in everything that has happened in my life and in the memories that bubble to the surface that give me joy and make me wistful and remind me of the legacy God prepared for me long before he made the first star in the sky.

Kreative Blogger Award

2009-06-24T18:08:00.005-04:00

What a blessing to receive this award from one of the most "Kreative" people I know! Andrea at Arise 2 Write awarded this to me and I am honored to be considered her friend. I am amazed at how she encourages me and everyone else in her world. She is a wonderful person and a great friend.

I am required to nominate 7 other bloggers for this award and they are supposed to nominate 7 others. (Be sure to leave a comment on their blog about the award.) After they accept the award they are then asked to write a list of 7 things that their blog readers may not already know about them. I would like to pass this award on to the following:

Sharon ~ her journey
Today's Christian Mom
Inspirational Poetry of Joy and Peace
Graceful Abandon
Splashin' Glory
Seed Thoughts
LindyLou-Walking Through Womanhood

Here are 7 things about me:
1) I'm the oldest of 5 children (3 sisters after me and a brother-the youngest child)
2) When I was young I wanted to be a Psychologist.
3) I've lived in 5 states: Washington, Wisconsin, Massachusetts, Virginia, North Carolina
4) I'm 3/4 Irish and 1/4 German - My dad always told us girls, "You're Irish and you're beautiful; you're German and you're smart."
5) At one point in my childhood I knew all the words to Big Rock Candy Mountain, Down in the Valley and all the Clancy Brothers songs (They're an Irish folk group).
6) I took piano lessons for 5 years and taught myself to play guitar in my teen years - can't play either any more!
7) I believe in angels.

I hope you'll stop by the blogs of the bloggers I've tagged. You will be blessed.

What Did I Miss?

2009-06-20T09:14:00.003-04:00

"What did the boys play with while I was at school?" For many weeks, this was the first question out of sister's mouth upon being buckled into the car seat to ride home from pre-school.

She didn't say hello. She didn't want to know what was for lunch. She didn't want to know if we could play outside after nap. She wanted to know what she had missed! She wasn't worried only about what she had missed, but also if the boys had played with any of her things while she wasn't around to protect them! After several weeks of this, I shared with my mom how frustrated I was.

She told me "You big girls always ran into your rooms after school to see what the babies had played with while you were at school." (There were we three "big girls" born within 4 years of each other and then the "babies" a year apart four years after the youngest 'big girl') Mom recounted how we often came running with the complaint that the babies had played with our Barbies or how "they got out my (insert the prized possession of the moment)", etc. After that, I gave big sister a break!

Too often I worry about other people--what they have, what they say, what they do. I make judgments about them and their actions. I criticize (often to myself) how they live and how they conduct their lives. It's a human failing, I know! I just seem to have to catch myself way too often.

Instead of worrying about what I'm missing, I need to focus on what I should be doing! God has given me some pretty specific instructions: WRITE! Not only has He instructed me to write, He gave me a writer's DNA and a mission and a vision to go with it! He wants me to do what I'm supposed to do and not worry about anybody else's instructions, abilities, missions or attempts to obey God's call upon their lives.

We are all sinners, and as Paul so eloquently and unabashedly states in 1 Timothy, "Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst." That also means I need to give others in my life "a break."

God wants us to look to the Cross before we judge others, and also before we beat ourselves up for falling short of who and what we want to do and be. He died for all of us -- my neighbor, my friend, my spouse, my children, my coworkers -- and even for me!

"But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life (1 Timothy 1:16 NIV).

"Do not let your heart envy sinners, but always be zealous for the fear of the LORD" (Proverbs 23:17 NIV).

TRUCK! BUS! CHURCH!

2009-06-05T18:26:00.007-04:00

This past year big sister attended a two-morning-a-week nursery school at their church, about 1.5 miles from the house.

One one might be tempted to think that I would then "have a break" to be minus one child two mornings a week. Picture this: urge brothers to finish breakfast; urge sister to eat something--anything--for breakfast. Change diapers. Take one of the twins to the potty (the other one was having none of it!). Dress both boys, put socks and shoes on both boys. Get jackets on. Load all three children in the car. Are you tired yet?

Each Tuesday and Thursday morning the boys were so excited! They considered these days full of great adventure! They got to ride in Mary's car! They got to go somewhere! Sister and brothers alike made announcements along the route. "There's the school bus people," sister would point out, referring to the children waiting on the corner for the school bus.

"Truck!" one of the boys would shout! "Bus, Mary! Bus," the other would announce. By the time we made it through the neighborhood and on to the main road to head toward church, everyone in the car was quite animated! I can recall several times I even looked for something exciting to point out! Once on the main road, it was a contest to see who would spy the church first.

During the fall and winter, we could see the steeple through the trees. Most often, though, we passed several busses, trucks, and "van's like mommy's" by the time we turned onto the road where the church was. "CHURCH!!!" one of the boys bellowed every single time to we turned the corner to pull into the church lot.

The favorite part of the entire trip was the "double bump" right after pulling in to the parking lot (a speed bump). Every time we crossed the speed bump the boys giggled. Every time.

As I was riding to the other side of town today to attend a training, I drove past that same church. I traveled over the James River - very high due to all the recent rainfall. I passed neighborhoods I hadn't seen or noticed previously. I even noticed traffic patterns and places in the road where several inches of the extensive rain we've had lately had pooled.

I was alert and very aware of all the sights along my way. I realized that on a regular work day, I make my trip rather routinely. I don't generally focus on the simple things in my path. I don't make a point to enjoy some of the beauty of the trees, shrubs, gardens and other plants in yards and courtyards, parks and median strips.

So often we just "get through" our daily activities. We forget to stop and admire the beauty God has created all around us. We don't take the time to notice how amazing our world is. We fail to thank God for His world and everything in it. We don't notice the amazing clouds or the glorious sun on the horizon. We take for granted our blessings.

Jesus told us to become like a child to enter the kingdom of heaven. Today I was challenged to appreciate my little part of the world and everything in it. Today I remembered to thank God for the little things that make life worth living. Today I remembered three little children who continue to enrich my life!

"I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it" (Mark 10:15 NIV)

Bubbles of Prayer

2009-05-27T18:37:00.008-04:00

I don't know what it is about bubbles that makes people so happy! The children I used to nanny for loved to blow bubbles! When big sister was barely 2 years old and the boys still napped a lot, sister and I spent many hours on the balcony of their apartment with a bottle of bubbles.

At first she couldn't blow them by herself, so eventually we decided I would blow and she would chase. That worked pretty well, actually, until I got winded! From the time the boys could walk they have wanted to be able to blow bubbles. This past spring they finally mastered it to varying degrees. They just giggle and run after the bubbles as if they were grasping for valuable treasures.

The trend now is also to blow bubbles as the wedding couple leaves the reception hall. We did that for my daughter's wedding and it was very festive.

The site, 42explore.com explains:

"Bubbles are round pockets of air or other gases in liquid (such as boiling water, fizzy drinks) or solid materials (plastic, glass). Bubbles can also be a thin, ball-shaped film of liquid that has gas trapped inside. Soap bubbles are shaped by an equilibrium between their outward air pressure and the inward surface tension of the soap film.

The detergent molecules tend to line up with one end pointing inward and the other outward, making the liquid surface more stable. The thickness of the soap film layer is due to these detergent molecules and is uniform for all size bubbles. Colors are seen because of the light diffraction through the soap film."

I don't know what it is about bubbles - the beauty, the wonder, the colors, their floating in the air, having the feeling of creating something unique and beautiful . . . Sometimes the children just stand and watch to see how high a bubble will float, or how far away it will go before it pops or disappears from site.

Years ago now, a small group of us gathered at our church sanctuary for intercessory prayer. We prayed aloud the name of every single person in every single family in our church as well as any particular prayer requests that had been lifted up during Sunday service.

We typically met on Sunday evenings. The church was quiet, the lights were low and we centered ourselves to pray the names of our brothers and sisters in Christ prior to beginning our sacred ritual.We divided up the pages of the list and each of us read our own pages aloud, simultaneously.

One of my praying companions said that sometimes she would just stop and listen to the others of us reading names, each of us at a different place on the list. She said it had a beautiful sound to her and when she closed her eyes she imagined that each name was encased in a bubble, floating up to heaven.

I love the idea of that imagery. It really made me tingle when she shared that vision with us. I felt as if we were encasing the souls of all those whose names we read in a type of supernatural force field --sending them directly to the Lord's throne.

Bubbles are just round pockets of air. Something about them though brings out the child in us. Something about intercessory prayer made me feel the presence of the Holy Spirit. Perhaps that is what transported those names into the heavens. Perhaps a round pocket of the Holy Spirit surrounded those names and guarded them on their journey.

Even now, many years later, I think of those times we gathered and sent bubbles of prayer aloft to heavenly realms.

Don't Eat That Cookie. You'll Ruin Your Dinner

2009-05-19T07:50:00.007-04:00

God's word is sometimes hard to hear. His instructions are challenging. Though we may fully believe God wants only what is good for us--what is best for us--spiritually, emotionally and physically, we don't always do as He commands.

Because I realize I have spent a great deal of time being disobedient to God's instructions, I generally demonstrate a tremendous amount of patience with toddlers who are testing limits and trying hard to find out how far "too far" really is! God gives us a great deal of latitude, I think. Because He is all knowing and all powerful, He often manages to get us to His desired place for us in spite of our own actions. He invented time and space itself, so His purpose and plan are never undone.

Like parents telling a child not to eat a cookie 30 minutes before lunch, God tells us how to live and act in accordance with His plans for us. Of course, disobeying a parent, snictching a cookie and gobbling it down in spite of our parent's instructions has a far less significant consequence than does our defiance of God's instructions!

That is how we learn though. First we learn that eating that cookie will, indeed, ruin our dinner. Then we learn that leaving our toys in the driveway could result in their being run over and broken. Not picking up our toys will result in their being taken away or getting lost.

Not doing what God tells us to do often results in our feeling disappointed in ourselves, guilty for our disobedience, and leads to our remembering (hopefully!) the next time we decide to defy God's word how badly we felt the last time! Just as we give children leeway and allow them to make choices, God gives us free will. Sometimes that results in pain, discomfort, sorrow. But it always leads to a deeper understanding that God's will is what we should strive for.

"This book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you shall make your way prosperous, and then you shall have good success" (Joshua 1:8 RSV).

Drama? Who Doesn't Like Drama?

2009-05-16T08:54:00.003-04:00

I don't know about you, but I've witnessed some pretty intense meltdowns in my day! There is no more woeful site than a 2-year old who is so utterly frustrated with life that the only option is to get on the floor, cry, kick and scream. It can either melt your heart or add to what was probably an already mounting frustration with said 2-year old!

I haven't made many blog posts this past week or so because I've been caught up in some drama of my own. It's not really my drama, but I took possession of it. I coddled it, nurtured it and fed it all week long!

I allowed some of my coworker's issues to become my issues and so I allowed them to pass along some of their drama to me. I don't know why I allowed this to happen! Well . . . I guess I do! I took my eye off Jesus for a while. Oh, every morning in my prayer time I gave my day to Him and begged forgiveness for taking it back within 2 hours of arrival at work each day.

By Friday I found myself mentally, emotionally and even physically drained. It was about being right! It wasn't about some big cause or a major issue. It was a battle of wills and I just wasn't willing to let it go. Oh my, what a drama ensued!

It wasn't until this morning that I realized I had not taken the high road. I needed to just let "it" go and give it to God. I should have been just focusing on my job, my responsibilities and not taken things so personally. That's what happens when we fail to make God the center of our lives and replace Him with our own egos.

Two-year olds usually recover pretty quickly and get on about the business of living their lives. I need to follow their example, get my sense of humor back and get on with what I need to do.

"How long, O men, will you turn my glory into shame ? How long will you love delusions and seek false gods ? Selah" (Psalm 4:2 NIV)

"Blessed is the man who makes the LORD his trust, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods." (Psalm 40:4 NIV)

It's Raining. It's Pouring.

2009-05-07T07:08:00.006-04:00

It has been raining for several days in my part of the country. I mean relentless, continual rain! Anyone who cares for little children can learn pretty early on to dread rainy days. Rain means it will be an "inside day."

I'm not a big fan of allowing children to be entertained by hours of television. Even good children's programming can be overdone. But I do take advantage of one or two rainy days in a row by working puzzles with the children, coloring, playing with playdough and yes, getting caught up on the new episodes of Dora, Diego, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and several other favorite programs.

By the third and fourth days, though, everybody is bored. Even a two year old can only tolerate watching the same episode of Dora the Explorer so many times before he loses interest. Those days can be troublesome if I don't have something up my sleeve to entertain everyone.

Follow the leader, making music with household items, doing stickers, pulling out a new puzzle or a new book is a must! The children look to me and rely upon me to keep them from acting up and acting out from boredom and lack of outside play and sunlight.

I get restless like this when I haven't spent enough quality time with God. Even if I do devote some time to prayer and reflection and lean on familiar scripture for encouragement or guidance, sometimes it just doesn't seem to be enough.

When I start getting anxious, allow worry to overtake me I know the "routine" isn't working. When I begin to snap at my husband and be short-tempered in traffic and impatient in the check out line at the grocery store, I begin to resemble a two-year old on the third "inside day" in a row!

Those are the times I need to do more than the routine. That is when I need to open my bible and delve into its wisdom and beauty. I need to turn to God's word to get me back on track. I need to ask God to lead me to a new understanding of the scripture to which He leads me.

I can't control how many rainy days God allows. But I can control my attitude. Just as the children turned to me for guidance and help staying on the right path, I turn to God for His strength and wisdom.

"To God belong wisdom and power; counsel and understanding are his" (Job 12:13 NIV).

The Beginner's Guide to Aerodynamics

2009-05-02T08:29:00.008-04:00

One of the things the three children for whom I nannied loved the most was to play outside. They didn't care how cold it was. The heat didn't bother them. They wanted to be outside every single day. They would have gone out in the rain had I allowed it!

One of the twins is a train and truck man. The other twin loves planes. Whenever we hear a sound that could even remotely be the sound of a helicopter rotor or a jet engine, we all look up! "Airplane, Mary!" Then we all look up in the sky to see if we can be the first to spot the plane or helicopter. "Do you see it?" one of them will inevitably ask. Whoever is the first to see it, calls out and points, "There it is!"

Did you think a lesson on flight was coming? You're right!

What is aerodynamics? The word comes from two Greek words: aerios, concerning the air, and dynamis, which means force. Aerodynamics is the study of forces and the resulting motion of objects through the air. Judging from the story of Daedalus and Icarus, humans have been interested in aerodynamics and flying for thousands of years, although flying in a heavier-than-air machine has been possible only in the last hundred years. Aerodynamics affects the motion of a large airliner, a model rocket, a beach ball thrown near the shore, or a kite flying high overhead. The curveball thrown by big league baseball pitchers gets its curve from earodynamics. (http://www.grc.nasa.gov/WWW/K-12/airplane/bga.html)

I had the idea for this post the other day as I sat on my deck. In the sky a hawk appeared to just hang in the air as if in suspended animation. There was a slight wind, a bit brisker than a breeze. At first I thought it was an optical illusion - that he just appeared to be suspended, stationary in the sky. Then I realized he was indeed "just hanging out" in the sky, wings extended, head out.
What a vista he must have had.

I'm sure he could see our entire neighborhood and beyond. I don't know if he was just tired and had stopped to take advantage of the aerodynamic event of the wind blowing in two different directions, thus allowing him to stay where he was, or if he just paused to enjoy the beauty of God's creation from a vantage point nearer to God than if he had been earthbound.

I am afraid of heights and I don't particularly enjoy flying in a plane. But I do enjoy craning my neck and looking up to the sky any time I see or hear a plane. I very much enjoy watching the birds fly and coast and soar through the sky. I marvel at the world God has created, just as the boys are learning to be aware of and appreciate God's world.

God's world expands beyond the earthbound vantage point from which we view our lives. Every time I look up, I think of God "up there" in heaven. I think of the world beyond myself and beyond the box of the space I occupy on the earth. I think of heaven and the promise that I will be there one day.

The boys have taught me how to make it through every single day: LOOK UP!

"God called the expanse "sky." And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day" (Genesis 1:8 NIV).

"These are the visions I saw while lying in my bed: I looked, and there before me stood a tree in the middle of the land. Its height was enormous. The tree grew large and strong and its top touched the sky; it was visible to the ends of the earth. Its leaves were beautiful, its fruit abundant, and on it was food for all. Under it the beasts of the field found shelter, and the birds of the air lived in its branches; from it every creature was fed" Daniel 4:10-12 NIV).

God's Ready, Set, Go! Part 3 - Go!

2009-04-26T07:36:00.005-04:00

In parts one and two of this Ready, Set, Go! Series I shared how the twins preparing to race their trucks down the hallway compared to our preparing to do what God has called us to do.

I shared that the “get set” part of the process can be excruciating for someone like me who tends to have some false starts along the way. However, it is worth the effort if we will just stick it out and allow God to work us toward His perfect plan. Once we’re ready and set, God expects us to Go!

That means we’ve confirmed whether or not our original revelation is still applicable. We’ve determined if our original understanding of God’s call was accurate or not and made any changes and adjustments needed to stay in line with His call on our lives.

After completing training and/or spending time learning about various ministries and ministry areas, we can determine if we have enough experience and knowledge to actually do the work to which we are called. If God is telling us to “Go!” we can be pretty certain He believes we are ready! Now we need to seek out opportunities to fulfill our call.

Once we’ve made our decision, we want to let our trusted friends and advisors know about it. Ask them to pray for us as we take this giant leap of faith. Most important: Continue to lean on God. Step out in faith! God will sustain us and uplift us in our obedience.

God puts a call on each of our lives, whether it is something huge, like becoming President of the United States, or something smaller like rearing Godly children, teaching, nursing, writing a novel, being an employee with integrity, offering encouragement and hope to others or a host of other tangible and less tangible ways to live out God’s desire and vision for your life.

After spending time and prayer getting ready, we need to revisit our original assumptions and ideas and interpretations. Then we need to refine and focus our understanding and prepare in earnest to respond to God’s call. Finally, we wait at the start line for the “Go!” from God.

Walk in all the way that the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper and prolong your days in the land that you will possess. (Deuteronomy 5:33 NIV)

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1 NIV)

Running from God

2009-04-18T09:00:00.006-04:00

(The details of this story have been modified somewhat to protect the privacy of the individuals involved.)

I was on a rare trip the shopping mall and had treated myself to a fancy decaf coffee. As I sat on one of the benches, I relaxed and did some people-watching.

Just down the way a bit, near enough to see, but almost out of ear shot I witnessed a woman and a young girl, about 12 or 13, having an argument. Actually, the woman was holding on to the girl's arm and it was obvious they were struggling--not just in a battle of wills, but an actual physical struggle.

I assumed the argument had begun as a discussion about something the girl wanted to buy - or have her mom buy. (Can you tell my daughter was a teenager not too long ago?) After the mom disapproved of or denied the purchase, perhaps the girl got upset with her and said something disrespectful. If you have children you know how that kind of thing can escalate pretty quickly, especially if you're tired or don't feel well!

I instantly said a prayer over them. I noticed that they were attracting more and more attention, and I could actually hear bits and pieces of what was now a shouting match. Then, the girl wrested herself away from her mom and ran. She ran fast and hard and headed right out the doors of the food park.

A young woman approached the mom (apparently a friend or older sibling of the girl) and both of them took off out the doors.

I couldn't help but think how running was the worse thing that girl could have done. She needed to be in the loving arms of her mother, who could protect her and guide her and teach her how to be a godly woman. (I know, a lot of assumptions here.)

I've spent a lot of years of my life running from God in just this same way. He holds on tight, attempting to keep me on track, loving me and nurturing me, refining and preparing me for the purpose He has planned for my life. But I ran. I ran hard and I ran fast, more times than I can count.

Like that young girl, I wanted what I wanted, and I wanted it now! I didn't understand at the time that God knew what was best for me. I didn't trust that He only wanted good for me and to prosper me in all my ways. I didn't hope in him, but rather set my sights on wordly things.

Now that I understand God's deep longing for me to be in His presence, I am sorry I didn't run to Him sooner. My life would have been much less anxious and I could have been about the business of fulfilling His divinely designed purpose for my life a long time ago!

O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. (Psalm 130:7 NIV)

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. (Proverbs 13:12 NIV)

The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; (Lamentations 3:25 NIV)

God's Ready, Set, Go! Part 2 - Set

2009-04-17T13:07:00.018-04:00

Click to read Part 1 of God's Ready, Set, Go!

As a quick review, I compared the process the twins run through as they prepare to race their trucks down the hall with how we prepare to do what God has called us to do. After we have completed the "Ready" steps, we need to get "set."

1) Once we have determined what it is God desires us to do we need to refine our determination. Does the original revelation still make sense? Have we been accurate in our understanding?

2) After we have received training or spent time learning about a particular ministry or ministry area, we need to determine if we have received enough training or had enough experience to do the work we believe God is calling us to. Is this the way we are carry out the work? Is this the vehicle or should we create or start our own group, team or mission opportunity?

3) Evaluate the advice and feedback you have received from others in light of what you have discovered through answering the questions posed in (1) and (2) above. Does their advice still apply? If not, is it because God has revealed a new/better path than your original plan? Do you need to revisit your new understanding of God's plan for you with those you trust?

4) Continue to call out to God that you are ready to do His will. Confirm to Him that you are willing to wait on His timing and His plan. Ask God to reveal His plan with greater clarity and understanding while you wait and prepare to "Go!"

I shared in my fist post, "The twins will, indeed wait for me. They will not move an inch until I tell them to go. Oh that I would have that kind of self-discipline and endurance in the race of life!"

However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace. (Acts 20:24 NIV)

[ God Disciplines His Sons ] Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1 NIV)

Leaving A Mark On The World

2009-04-14T14:54:00.006-04:00

The boys had finished breakfast, we had dropped of sister at preschool and returned home to watch a favorite show on television. I took the opportunity to jot down some notes for a draft of an article in my journal.

One of the twins realized at some point that I wasn't sitting with him and came over to investigate what I was up to. When he saw I was writing he asked me to get him some crayons so he could color. He did make a few swipes on a piece of paper, but he was much more interested in what I was doing.

He decided he wanted to "write" in my journal with me. He selected a pink crayon for the job and I allowed him to scribble a few lines on my current page, knowing I would still be able to read my black-inked words on the page.

Then he wanted to turn the page and mark on another page. Ultimately each written-on page of my journal was graced with pink scribbles. He wanted to leave his mark on the pages. I knew the end of my time as his nanny was nearing and I was kind of sentimental about having his handiwork as a permanent part of my journal.

After he moved on to a few blank pages I eased him back to paper actually intended for coloring. Of course he wanted my pen for that, so I sat next to him to closely supervise while his brother made his way to my lap, not wanting to miss out on anyting.

Brother saw that his twin had been allowed to write in the journal so he felt compelled to add his blue "writing" to the pink marked pages. I now have a permanent reminder of my time with both of the boys.

It made me think about how I'm doing at leaving my mark on the world. Am I bringing as many to Christ as I possibly can? Am I spreading the Good News of Jesus Christ to a world desperately in need of hope?

Both boys were thorough and very methodical in their quest to leave their mark. God expects nothing less of us.

"The Redeemer will come to Zion, to those in Jacob who repent of their sins," declares the LORD.(Isaiah 59:20 NIV)

I write to you, dear children, because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name.(1 John 2:12 NIV)

Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. (John 6:35 NIV)

FAN OF YOUR SITE AWARD!

2009-04-13T19:09:00.002-04:00

Andrea at Arise 2 Write honored me with this award! She is a true encourager to me and I so value her friendship.

I hope you'll stop by her blogs and see what she's been up to. Her Arise 2 Write blog documents her writing and faith journey. All God's Creatures is written in the voice of one of the therapy dogs, Sitka, who lives with Andrea and her family.

You'll be blessed to read her posts and learn about how God uses her gift of writing to minister to His world.

God's Ready, Set, Go!

2009-04-12T14:07:00.011-04:00

This is the first in a three-part series I've entitled God's Ready, Set, Go!

The twins love to play with their cars and trucks! Not too long ago we were all watching a program where the characters were racing and we heard the term "Ready, Set, Go!" several times (as a reinforcement to teach the concept, I'm sure.) The boys picked up on it pretty quickly and ever since, they call to me, "Ready, Mary!" when they are lined up to race (either by themselves or to race against each other).

The twins have 2 Little Tykes trucks that stand about 12 inches tall, have very sturdy (hard plastic) wheels and make a crashing sound when the front "bumper" hits against a wall or a babysitter/nanny:-) These particular trucks were obviously built for heavy use and for exactly the capacity of a two-year old boy as he leans/pushes it.

When the boys decide they want to push their truck back and forth on the "racetrack/front entryway" or the long hall that runs from the back of the house through the family room, they go through a routine:

1) Locate desired vehicle.
2) Push or carry vehicle to the start point.
3) Position body over vehicle and prepare to push off.
4) Call out, "Ready, Mary!"

If I don't respond with the announcement in a timely enough manner, they will repeat themselves until I tell them I am ready to tell them 'ready, set, go.'

God works in our lives in much the same way. He gives us a gift or ability, a skill or a deep desire to achieve a goal. He expects us to ready ourselves to accomplish His will by refining the gift, training and learning to enhance our skill or ability. He nurtures our deep desire to achieve His work by placing us in situations, presenting opportunities and introducing people into our lives.

So how does God's ready, set, go correlate to our preparing to accomplish God's work in the world?

1) (Locate the desired vehicle) Determine the desired work

2) (Get into position) - join a group, take a course or class, receive training or start a campaign to begin the journey toward the goal God has placed in your heart.

3) (Position body over vehicle and prepare to push off.) Pray and reflect upon the path you are on. Talk about your plans to others whose opinions and wisdom you trust and respect. Ask God to affirm and confirm your plan.

4) (Call out, "Ready, Mary!") Let God know you're prepared to receive the training, go through the life experiences, pray for His guidance and prepare yourself to do what He has put in your heart.

It can be an excruciating process for someone like me who tends to have some false starts along the way. I have the "ready" part down pretty well. It's the "Get Set" part that I still to work on! We must be fully prepared, but we must also wait on God's timing. If we decide we're ready to go before we have received all we need to do well, we cannot be truly ready to do God's will.

The twins will, indeed wait for me. They will not move an inch until I tell them to go. Oh that I would have that kind of self-discipline and endurance in the race of life!

I went in response to a revelation and set before them the gospel that I preach among the Gentiles. But I did this privately to those who seemed to be leaders, for fear that I was running or had run my race in vain. (Galatians 2:2 NIV)

Click to read Part 2 of God's Ready, Set, Go!

Children Live What They Learn

2009-04-11T17:48:00.001-04:00

This folksy saying is really true and I guess that's why it is said so often. I am back in the "mental health services for children" field. My new job - 3 days a week - involves ensuring that all of the case worker reports include the information required by varous regulatoy bodies and in compliance with company policy.

Some of the services range from a 'mentoring' program, which I imagine is similar to a Big Brother/Big Sister type relationship with a bit more focus on building specific skills, to intensive in-home services and the whole range in between.

What is evident in almost 100% of the cases I read about each day at work is that many of the the behavioral/mental health issues of the children are a direct result of the parenting or lack thereof of the adults in their lives. Some of the mental illness might be considered hereditary, but most of it is "nurture" influence.

I grieve for the children in our program as many of them have suffered emotional, physical and/or sexual abuse, struggle with substance abuse and a general lack of coping skills to deal with their daily lives.

I don't know how to stop the cycle, except to do what agencies like the one I work for is trying to do: provide services to the child(ren) and also to the families that are often the source or a mitigating factor in the children ending up in our program in the first place.

What is apparent is that once parents learn how to parent, once they are educated about appropriate behavior and acceptable ways to interact with their children, life improves not only for the children, but for the entire family unit. There a some "success" stories. Those are the ones you live for. Those are the ones that make you want to go to work each day. There's always a chance for improvement.

Children are God's gift to the world. They are our future. We must nurture and love them so they can grow up to nurture and love - themselves and each other and everyone else in the world.

Remember the day you stood before the LORD your God at Horeb, when he said to me, "Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children." (Deuteronomy 4:10 NIV)

Keep his decrees and commands, which I am giving you today, so that it may go well with you and your children after you and that you may live long in the land the LORD your God gives you for all time. (Deuteronomy 4:40 NIV)

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. (Deuteronomy 6:6-8 NIV)

Their children, who do not know this law, must hear it and learn to fear the LORD your God as long as you live in the land you are crossing the Jordan to possess." (Deuteronomy 31:13 NIV)

Different is . . Well . . . Different

2009-04-06T21:28:00.003-04:00

Big sister is 4 years old. She is exceptionally bright and some of the things she comes up with just make me shake my head and chuckle.

Some of the comments she makes on a regular basis:

"Looks like we're driving in The United States of America." - as we pass by a very large flag on a very high flag pole.

"There are the 'school people'." - as we pass by the students waiting at the bus stop for the school bus.

I especially like the way she tries to explain things to her brothers. Her tone of voice become very sing-songy and pleaseant and she is very serious - not even realizing that not only to do the boys not care in the least, they can't even understand what she's talking about!

All the children who live in the neighborhood are "my friends" and the students in her preschool class are "my children."

She views and experiences the world from a 4-year old perspective. Everything revolves around her (as it does for most 4 year olds, and honestly, most people!) To deal with life in the world, everything must be placed in a category and defined in very limited and specific terms.

Honestly, this is how many Christians experience their faith. Their beliefs are narrow and limited to their own personal experiences. For some, anyone who looks different, acts different, lives different is . . . well . . . different and so not like them. When you're 4 years old different isn't good. Different is challenging and troubling. So different isn't good.

When we limit our faith to what we ourselves can see and think and feel, we are really limiting God. When we don't seek the knowledge and wisdom of others who have more scriptural insight and knowledge, we limit the power of God's inspired word. When we judge others out of ignorance and fear, we limit the strength and depth and breadth of the love Christ died to show us. When we limit God, we miss out on His grace and we miss out on the opportunity to extend that grace to others.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. (1 Corinthians 13:11 NIV)

Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. (1 John 3:7 NIV)

Another Award! How Wonderful!

2009-04-05T13:16:00.004-04:00

Andrea at Arise 2 Write has given me the Premio Dardos award! What exactly is the award? I share Mid Stutsman's explanation: Premio Dardos means “prize darts” in Spanish. It is given for recognition of cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values transmitted in the form of creative and original writing.Here are some rules to be followed if you choose to participate in passing this blog award on to others:

• First, accept the award by posting it on your blog along with the name of the person that has granted the award and link to her blog.

• Second, pass the award to other blogs that are worthy of this acknowledgment, remembering to contact each of them to let them know they have been selected for this award. This is the challenging part for me as the past couple of weeks, quite a few awards have been passed around!

Here are two great blogs that I think you'll agree meet this criteria:

Jen Lemen at her blog: http://jenlemen.com/blog/
Tammy Boesiger at her blog - http://tamiboesiger.blogspot.com/

Thanks, again, Andrea for considering me worthy of this award. To God be the glory.

I Heard The Ice Cream Truck Today

2009-03-31T17:50:00.004-04:00

I hear the ice cream truck coasting down the street and playing that unmistakable music. Every time I hear an ice cream truck I'm instantly transported to the cul-de-sac where I spent many of my formative years. Today was one of those days that reminded me of that time too.

After nap time all three children were ready to play outside. It was a glorious day and I was so glad the rain held off. There is a vacant lot next door and the builders left a huge sand pile there for the children to play in. And there were a lot of children playing in the sand pile this afternoon!
I can remember spending hours in the court, playing kick the can, riding our bikes, playing mother-may-I and I don't really remember what all we did except that we played every summer day all day long until long after dark! I'm sure we were called in for dinner at some point, but surely we wolfed down whatever was on the menu to rush back out.

My three little ones did really well playing in the sand until "the neighbor kids" came over. I say "neighbor kids" with a tone of exasperation and dismay because of how the neighbor kids are. One mom sends her girls, ages 4, 7, 10 out to play for hours, never checking on them, leaving the task, I imagine to me - because I do stay out there every second the children are in the yard. They're not bad girls, they're just used to being allowed to run a bit wild - no bike helmets, bare feet and shorts when it's 70 degrees, etc. When all three of them come over to play it's like an invading army.

The other "neighbor kids" who came over included a dad and his two boys. I had noticed him playing with them for quite a while in the yard and playing with sidewalk chalk, etc., His boys weren't bad either. Except the older one, who I think is six, who is hyperactive and never speaks below a bellow! He ran down the boys a couple of times and made me really tense. The little brother, who is probably 2 1/2, also screams, (go figure) and he ran into the street several times. Once he got almost to the end of the cul-de-sac and dad never even got up out of the sand pile! I ran and grabbed him and carried him back to his dad when I saw a car coming.

I know . . . I'm a real stick-in-the-mud. I'm the "mean old lady" even to the couple for whom I nanny I'm pretty sure. But this is my point: my children turned out to be amazing, bright, polite, generous, gracious and just generally decent human beings (when they're at their best:-)

They did not run wild. They did not scream or bellow. They did not even cross the street until they were probably 8 or 9 and then only with parent watching them. We could take them out to eat and they were well-behaved. When they were older my kids never tried drugs. They are good friends to their friends. They don't judge others and they don't say mean things about other people.

They got spanked when they needed a spanking (not often) and they never questioned who was in charge. My daughter was 22 years old before she told me she didn't like squash even though she ate it her entire life because I fixed it often in the summer time. No they're not perfect. Far from it. But I couldn't be more proud of them. We made plenty of mistakes, but I think the kind of people they are today speaks for itself.

What's my point? Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. [Proverbs 22:6 NKJ]

Chilren are a gift from God. If we don't teach them right from wrong, if we don't teach them limits, if we don't guard them and ensure they are safe, we are squandering our gift. My "parenting" style is clearly different than that of those in the neighborhood where my employers live. I hope and pray all those children will grow up happy and healthy, wise and good.

Dance for Joy

2009-03-24T10:37:00.004-04:00

One of the twins loves to dance. He 'dances' at every opportunity. If characters on one of his television shows dances, he announces "I dance." If he likes the music playing during a commercial, he declares, "I dance." Sometimes, he dances just because he feels like dancing! On more than one occasion he and sister, and subsequently the other twin decide they're going to "dance" just for something to do!

Of course, at two years, the 'dancing twin' actually gallops and gallops around and around in a circle until he's dizzy. The other brother isn't as coordinated as even that and simply runs behind his brother in the circle. When all three of them get going it really is something to see! Let me put it this way: these children are more likely to appear on Battle of the Brains than Dancing with the Stars!

There is one thing, though, that stands out in their dancing. It is the sheer joy and abandon with which they move. Bright-eyed, faces aglow, around and around they go until they are breathless and ultimately collapse in a heap. It is a sheer joy to watch them.

At 4 and 2 (and 2) life is still full of joy and laughter, moving for the sheer delight of it, experiencing music in its most basic form - as a language that speaks to the soul.

Every time the dancing twin announces he's going to dance, I think about how my life would be so different if I were to dance the dance of my life with that same "reckless abandon." I realize, too how my sheer joy at living would impact the others in my life and in my world. They would surely respond to me as I do to the little dancing children who teach me so much about life.

Then Hannah prayed and said: "My heart rejoices in the LORD; in theLORD my horn is lifted high. My mouth boasts over my enemies, for I delight in your deliverance. (1 Samuel 2:1-3 NIV)

and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, (Luke 1:47 NIV)

Fabulous Blog Award!

2009-03-16T15:10:00.006-04:00

Yippee!! My fellow blogger, Sitka the Therapy Dog, just awarded me this wonderful award!

I hope you'll visit All God's Creatures where Sitka shares his experiences as a therapy dog and family member of the "Perdue Zoo."

His mom is pretty amazing, too and I think she may have influenced Sitka in my favor:-)

Two rules accompany this award:

1. Confess 5 things you are addicted to
2. Pass the award on to 5 deserving bloggers

Five addictions:

1. Coffee
2. Coffee
3. Blogging
4. Jesus
5. Writing

Not necessarily in that order. Yes, I know I listed coffee twice. I'll let that speak for itself:-)

Now . . . 5 bloggy friends:

1) Truth 4 The Journey. Sonya is not your typical stay at home mom! She homeschools her six children, writes prolifically, has a business, teaches and preaches and . . . well, I think you get the idea. She has a powerful message that she generously shares with the world.

2) Chatty Kelly. Kelly has a special way about her. I love her self-effacing humor, her transparency and her joy in living her life. Stop by to find out what word the Lord has put on her heart.

3) Rich Gifts. Edie is one of the most generous and thoughtful people I have known. She shares her gifts, graces, talents and abilities freely and with joy! She is very creative and God is using her in some beautiful ways. Check out her blog and see some of her handiwork.

4) Joanne Sher at An Open Book is such an inspiration! She shares not only her writing journey, her creativity and joy, but also offers us insights into her world. Her blog is bright and cheery and you'll be glad you stopped by.

5) Princess and the King is the blog where Spring shares her Love Letters to the King, Mary's Journal and other inspired writings. I often cry when I read either of these two but it is because they are so beautiful, not because I'm sad:-)

It was very challenging to select only 5 bloggers! I am blessed to follow many wonderful Christians who generously share their journey. But that was the rule!

I hope you'll stop by these 5 blogs and be enriched and encouraged.

Congratulations!

Blameless and Harmless

2009-03-12T20:47:00.005-04:00

About three years ago I worked as a lead teacher in an area preschool. My class was for the "older threes." These were the 3-year olds who would be going to kindergarten several months after their 5th birthdays.

I was quite a puzzle to these children when I became their teacher. You see, it is apparent that I love children. I mean most 3-5 year olds are drawn to me--I think they sense my passion and genuine love for them! I'm also, though, very no-nonsense. In my world, adults are in charge. Period. Also, in my world, when an adult gives you an instruction or tells you to do something, if you're under the age of 21: you DO IT! Yes, I'm really old fashioned like that:-) Yet my class was a place of fun and learning, comfortable and inviting and full of hugs and positive vibes.

Eventually I ended up with many of the "problem" children. By the time I left that day care my class consisted of ages ranging from 2 1/2 to 4! The two assistant teachers and I potty trained a couple who continually wet their pants for other teachers (not for us!) I converted a couple of hard core drama kings and queens into reasonably pleasant children when they were in my room.

We three teachers really clicked and we were all definitely on the same page. I generally found that the "problem children" were not the problem. Rather, the problems were the parents! One day after I had left for day and the assistant teacher who worked in the afternoons stayed on the playground with several of the children from our class she overheard a conversation between two of "our" boys. Apparently one of these two and another boy had exchanged words. Feelings were hurt, harsh words exchanged. The boys separated and went their separate ways.

The boy who was conversing with the other classmate told his friend about the incident. The other boy told him, "that's why we only hang around with people like this." (He pulled up his shirt sleeve and pointed to his arm.) These two boys were white. The other boy was black. My co-teacher was mortified! I was livid when she told me!

My tirade involved disbelief and abject horror that a three year old child's mind could already be filled with such thoughts and ideas. The child never even had a chance to learn any other way than one of prejudice and hatred. It cut me to my core. The boy who made that remark is one to whom I had devoted a great deal of attention that year. He had been difficult and uncooperative at first. It took a while for him to warm up to me and to begin to participate appropriately in class activities. Now I understood all too well the source of his behavioral issues!

I really questioned what I was doing there. I wondered how I could possibly make a difference in the lives of these children against such formidable odds. Now I understand I was placed in their lives for a purpose - a divine purpose. I was to be their light; I was to be blameless and harmless in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation. Hmm. That's a lot to expect of one so flawed and broken, sin-filled and imperfect.

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. (Matthew 5:16 KJV)

That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world; 9Philippians 2:15 KJV)

But ye, brethren, be not weary in well doing. (2 Thessalonians 3:13 KJV)

The Company We Keep

2009-03-12T19:10:00.005-04:00

The boys are now at the age where they are like little sponges. They don't miss a word, a look or a deed! They watch each other, too, to see how brother is doing something, to learn but also to file away the information.

When sister enters into the picture, even more information is processed and stored for later reference! One brother turns his sippy cup upside down, probably the other one does too. Sister dumps her dry Cheerios out of her bowl and eats them off the table, out go two more bowls of Cheerios onto two trays.

The boys watch to see what the other one will eat, too. It's kind of funny because the "littler" twin who used to be so picky now eats everything--I mean everyting--placed in front of him. The other, larger, stockier twin has become quite picky - mainly due to issues with texture:-)

Big sister has taught them a lot about how to be nice, how to share, how to sit at the table correctly. She's also taught them how to "raid the pantry" for snacks when no one is looking and how to claim a particular spot on the couch (middle cushion) as hers and only hers -- always. The boys consequently are quite territorial when they have a spot staked out, either on the floor, on the couch or on my lap! They also try to open every door, drawer, cabinet, container throughout the house!

The only other real influences in their lives right now are their family, me, and a few companions at 2-day-a-week daycare. So far, most of what they've been exposed to has been closely controlled and tightly guarded. But they're growing up. They're beginning to watch other people and file away information about their actions and their words. Soon, the world will firmly have a claim on them. I pray already for a hedge of protection around them and their sister.

Who we associate with has a direct relationship to how we act, how we think and how we live. If we surround ourselves with people who gossip, cheat, envy others, are judgmental, who lie, who mistreat others, etc., we begin to act and think and live as they do. If I don't guard my identity as a Christian, before I know it, I begin to act and live less and less like a Christian!

Sometimes we need to let go of people and relationships. Sometimes we have to take a stand about our faith. We need someone to whom we are accountable. I need Jesus. Every day. Every hour. I'm not strong enough or wise enough to stay in His presence without help. I need friends and family who know me and love me and help me stay on the path.

I will maintain my righteousness and never let go of it; my conscience will not reproach me as long as I live. (Job 27:6 NIV)

So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22For in my inner being I delight in God's law; 23but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. (Romans 7:21-23 NIV)

GUEST BLOGGER ANDREA PERDUE!

2009-03-06T19:39:00.002-05:00

I'm so pleased that Andrea agreed to be a guest blogger here at Crayon Chronicles. This is a duplicate of her post at one of her blogs, Arise 2 Write. This post is based upon a recent experience with Andrea's precious grandbaby. When your done reading this post, why not stop by Andrea's other post, All God's Creatures where she writes in the voice of Sitka, one of her amazing therapy dogs.

HERE'S THE POST:

Help Me, I'm Scared!!

God made each of us unique. Some of us love snow and some of us prefer the security of warm weather. There are also those of us who love both the beautiful ocean and as summer closes we can not wait until the first snow covers the ground. I am one who cherishes every aspect of God's creation. My heart leaps at the thought of tiptoeing through the warm sand, yet I eagerly dream of the cold winter day when GOD in all His glory spills forth snow from the heavens and surrounds me in a peaceful winter wonderland.

Sharing GODS creation is exhilarating and exciting. God graced us with a beautiful winter wonderland this week. Each of us celebrated His creation in our own unique way. My furry children are no different; three of them loved the snow, yet my 15 year old Cocker Spaniel, Macy said, "Please Mom....get me out of this stuff and let me back inside." My human children gathered their parka's gloves, boots, and raced to the garage to get the sled. They were eager to share this beautiful and amazing snow with our 20 month old granddaughter, Savannah.

Excited to see Savannah as she partook of her first snow, I grabbed my gear and raced outside to find a little girl unsure of her surroundings. From the windows of our home she had watched the snow fall with amazement saying, "WOW" over and over again. Savannah's "WOW" disappeared when she was placed in the snow. She was unsure of her footing and definitely not interested in being pulled around on a big red sled.

I wondered how many of us admire with amazement GODS gifts until they are given to us. We then become unsure and afraid. Can we do this? Are we really on the right track? How can we be sure?

When faced with fear, Savannah lifted her arms toward those she loves and trusts. She knew where to find safety, security, and love. With eyes filling with tears, her little arms reached toward the heavens past her earthly security.

Today, Savannah and I encourage you to seek your Heavenly Father when you are unsure, scared, or faced with uncertainty.

"Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

By His mercy and in the grip of HIS grace,

Andrea

On Being 2 and Other Challenges

2009-02-19T08:44:00.002-05:00

Well, since sister never really had the typical "terrible twos" I had hoped the brothers would make the same smooth transition from babyhood to toddler. Not so! Of course though the twins are as different as night and day, they are individually and as a unit different than their sister!

I won't say the boys are terrible because they're not. They are however firmly entrenched in the "terrible twos!" In any given 10 minute period they are sweet and loving, playing side by side and enjoying each other's company. Then one of them hits the other and is reprimanded. Then the one who was hit, hits back and the original discussion expands to "we" and "you boys."

Then one of the boys decides to do something "naughty." They just can't help themselves! Besides when you're two years old almost everything you perceive as fun and interesting is off-limits! What's a two-year old to do? I spend a lot of time holding the boys as they cry out of frustration because life in their world is challenging, frustrating and quite frankly confusing.

I've been through periods like that in my life. The 18 or so years I spent without Christ in my life - the 18-35 years - were exactly like that - confusing, challenging and frustrating. I spent a lot of time wandering lost and alone. I didn't know at the time what was missing from my life. Actually I think I did know. I don't know why I didn't run to God along the way. I was raised "in the church." I guess I just didn't have the good sense then. I believed I could do life on my own.

Now that I have been back in church almost 18 years I realize what I had missed. My "terrible twos" lasted a really long time. I had a lot of healing to do to recover from the effect of not abiding in Christ. I know it's a common story -- as one of my instructors shared -- it's legendary. Still . . . I lost a lot of years to praise God and rejoice in the gift of His Son.

I thank God that He used those years for my good--for His plan. He would have much preferred I had walked with Him during those years, just as I really wish the boys wouldn't go through the "legendary terrible twos." Fortunately, I understand this is a stage for them -- a season in which they are learning about themselves and others and their world, which grows larger and more challenging each day.

When I begin to run low on patience, I think of how God was so faithful to me through all those years. On the days when I think I may have to lock myself in the bathroom for a self-imposed time out, I realize how many times I must have broken God's heart. And I can't help but praise God for loving me enough to wait for me to run to Him. God promises to restore us to a right relationship with Him. Not that He wipes out the memory of those years, but He uses the memories as reminders of how we were - so we don't go back there again.

So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the crawling locust, the consuming locust, and the chewing locust, my great army which I sent among you. (Joel 2:25 New King James Version)

Running Laps and Fighting God

2009-02-07T08:54:00.003-05:00

What a week we had! All three little ones are healthy again after a very unpleasant month-long round of strep throat! How I didn't contract it can only be attributed to Divine protection!

The boys, now that they are two have a whole new set of boundaries to push and ideas to implement that just generally throw everyone else's world into utter chaos! They have decided they don't like nap time any more. Oh, after lunch when I say, "Let's go take a nap," they're right there ready to go. They even act very quiet and look so angelic as they snuggle their blankies and I shut the door to get sister settled for her nap. They need their afternoon nap and when they do sleep, the go for at least 2 hours.

Yesterday, however, they were having none of it! After I ate my lunch and cleaned up the kitchen, I settled down to read for a few minutes. By the 2nd paragraph I began hearing banging coming from the boys' room. After the day I found them signalling to the workmen in the cul-de-sac with their window blinds, I ran upstairs. They were both on their backs in their beds kicking the side of the bed.

Later, I went upstairs and one brother was digging in one of the drawers while the other brother was telling him, "No, no!" The third time (yes I made them stay up there -- it was Friday and I was exhausted:-) I went up because I heard heavy footsteps from their room and I thought they were running circles. Well . . . they were - in their cribs. Round and round the circuit of their cribs. OK. By this point I just shook my head, told them they had better go to sleep and left the room. (I know it's entertaining for them when I'm exasperated, so I'm glad I could offer them that!)

The final time I went upstairs because of yelling, both boys were in one bed (one of the twins loves to get in his brother's bed even though he has been bitten and pushed). Both of them had their shoes on the floor, socks off and one brother had figured out how to put the socks on his hands like a sock puppet. He was quite pleased with himself and held up his hands for me to admire his newly acquired skill.

The other brother had decided he didn't really want his socks off and so held them up to me saying, "socks, socks." Socks went on the feet of both boys. All boys were returned to their rightful place in the room. I not very sweetly informed them that they had better get to sleep or they were going to be in big trouble. (I'm pretty sure I heard them making fun of me in their secret twin language as I walked back downstairs for what was, gratefully, the last time.)

Ummm . . . I've wrestled with God that much. Or I should say He has wrestled with me! He has tried countless times to get my attention, to gently guide me, then more forcefully direct me, then finally just throw up His hands and wait for me to figure out that He wants what is best for me. He doesn't give up on me! He just gives up on my obeying according to His time and His plan. He waits for me to get with the program and then blessess me.

But grow in grace, and [in] the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him [be] glory both now and for ever. Amen. (2 Peter 3:18 )

I Need the Thing. The Thing on the Thing?

2009-01-28T08:09:00.003-05:00

The title represents a conversation I participated in on Tuesday. On Tuesday and Thursday mornings a kind of choreographed dance goes on at the home where I nanny. Big sister goes to preschool on those mornings and when I arrive, children are finishing (or in the midst of, or playing with) breakfast. Mom runs out to remove three car seats from her car, install them in my car and then comes back inside.

We either dress the boys or simply wipe down hands and face, brush sister's hair, put on coats (which the boys insist on zipping themselves, often ending in one or more boys crying on the way to the car because we usually don't have time to allow them to use this newly-acquired skill). Then all three children are installed in their carseats. Inevitibaly, I forget to get the garage door opener (the first "thing") to put in the car so I can pull into the garage when I get back from dropping sister off. Mom leaves for work while we're en route to school.

The garage door opener lives on top of the freezer they keep in the garage (the other "thing"). After our conversation, the mom and I both laughed, acknowledging that only two moms could have that conversation and know exactly what the other one meant!

Well . . . sometimes I talk that way to God. There are times when I really don't know exactly what to say to Him. Fortunately, God knows our thoughts even when we can't express them coherently. He knows the desires of our hearts and sees the yearning of our souls. He hears the words I don't know how to speak.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. (Romans 8:26)

My Socks Don't Match My Shirt

2009-01-23T18:04:00.003-05:00

An attention-getting headline, right? Well, the four-year old little girl I care for is very conscious of colors and matching her clothes. So of course, she checks out what everyone is wearing so she can gather data (no doubt!) on what really does look good together and what doesn't.

I'm not a fashion plate by anyone's definition. My daughter, now 24, managed to educate me pretty well over the years about what was and was not acceptable for any given event, locale, season, etc. I'm not an embarassment to anyone - at least not that they've told me!

I'm sorry, I nanny for three toddlers . . . I don't usually worry whether my socks match whatever shirt I happen to wear on any given day--or even each other! It is frankly the least of my concerns on those days:-) I never really thought about it making a difference until I got called on it one day by . . . you guessed it!

When you're four years old, things like that really matter. When your mom has told you that something you have just picked out and put on doesn't go together, it bugs you when others in your life don't have to match all the time. I get it. Really I do.

I can't help but think of all the times I judged others, not whether their socks matched their shirt, but by other standards that are just as petty. Those types of things are insignificant in God's eyes. We are not to use the wisdom of this world to form our opinions of others. And yet I do. Often. More often than I care to admit.

I'm growing in my faith development, though. I'm really trying to see others through the eyes of the One who created me and all the other people in this world with me. I really do attempt to view others as God would. It's not easy. It's really hard work. But to do otherwise gives power to the evil one. It also diminishes me as a person.

As Christians, we are to build each other up. We are to spread the Good News. We are not to conform to earthly standards. Our standard should be the Cross. And then we need to remember that the One who hung there did so for me and my sins.

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. [Romans 12:2 NIV]

The Pharisee in Me

2009-01-20T21:32:00.003-05:00

The boys turned 2 years old on Monday (Jan. 19)! Wow! It seems like just the other day they were tiny little bundles happily swinging in their baby swings and sleeping all the time (well . . . one of the boys--the other one still barely sleeps at all).

I was reminded today of a habit the boys have. It makes me chuckle every time it happens, but I dare not laugh because they are so serious. Whenever one of the boys is corrected by an adult (or big sister) the other one will then furrow his brow and in a very deep voice begin to chastise his brother. For instance, if I tell one of the boys, "don't throw your cup on the floor" the other one will turn to his brother, shake his finger and tell his brother, "NO! (followed by several unintelligible words)" very loudly.

The offense can be anything from throwing a sippy cup off the tray onto the floor, hitting sister, talking 'sassy' to someone, standing up on a chair . . . I think you get the picture. It doesn't matter what the offense is, the other brother seizes upon the opportunity to assert his (presumed) authority. The thing that makes me chuckle? Besides the fact that it's a riot to see the physical transformation when the boys assume the authoritative role, is the fact that each of the boys is equally as guilty of whatever offense is being highlighted!

Well . . . I'm guilty of that myself. Only it's not that cute when I do it. Yes, I accuse others of being selfish, short-sighted, insincere, etc. Remember when we were kids and someone called us a name? We would respond, "takes one to know one." Well, it's true when you're an adult too.

All too often I am guilty of the same fault/character flaw/shortcoming/sin I point out in others. Like the Pharisees in the New Testament, I build myself up by putting others down. When we see ourselves reflected in others in a less than attractive light, why are we so quick to cast aspersions on them, and let ourselves off the hook? Hmm . . . this is one for God and me to work on together.

The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men [are], extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. [Luke 18:11-12]

Teach me, and I will be silent; make me understand how I have erred. [Job 6:24]

For though the Lord is high, he regards the lowly; but the haughty he knows from afar. [Psalm 138:6]

Rejoining The Divine Conversation

2009-01-17T21:11:00.004-05:00

This evening I "babysat" for the children I nanny for during the week so mom and dad could go out to dinner alone. I've done this before, but it has been a while. It was odd to show up as the children were eating dinner versus breakfast.

As the mom and dad were leaving they told big sister to 'help Mary.' She nodded, looked at me and asked, "Do you know which bed the boys sleep in?" The adults all chuckled a little because I've been caring for the children for almost 2 years and they have been in their current house (with current sleeping arrangements) for a little less than 2 years. Her mom suggested she may want to help me figure out the toothbrushes at bedtime and she was pleased to have that responsibility.

Sister was disoriented because they most often have a "real" babysitter on the rare weekend evenings her mom and dad go out. The babysitters might not know which bed belonged to which boy (except for the fact that they now have their names hanging over their beds). Mary comes during the day and knows how everything works in the day time (and even has the same rules as mom) but not at night. All of her points of reference were out of whack.

Mine get out of whack sometimes too. If I have not been intentional about my prayer life and/or I don't make a point to spend time in bible study I can get off track as well. It's so easy to get out of those habits if we miss one opportunity. The next time, it becomes a little less pressing, then before long, we realize it's been days (weeks? ) since we spent time with God.

When we realize that, we usually also realize why our life has been so out of sync. Fortunately, God welcomes us back into the divine conversation with gladness and rejoicing.

Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. [Joshua 1:7 NIV]

Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil. [Proverbs 4:26-27 NIV]

God' s Arms

2009-01-13T20:51:00.003-05:00

You may want to stop by Divinely Designed and read about God's heartbreak. I couldn't decide where to post it and decided the issue was really a bigger one than how I in the world I was supposed to rub the back of one child, hold the other one in my lap, and make room for the third one without disrupting (or dropping!) either of the other two!

I'm glad God's arms are longer than mine:-) There's my post! God is big enough to handle all the problems and struggles in the world. I'm just sad that sometimes--more often than I care to admit--I add to His burden.

We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. [Hebrews 2:1 NIV]

Relying Upon a Firm Foundation

2009-01-09T11:50:00.003-05:00

The other day the children's mom told me that the boys had made quite a mess in their room. Apparently they had opened their two bottom dresser drawers and emptied them of all their contents. Clothes were everywhere on the floor and it was obvious the boys had enjoyed flinging the clothes as far as they could.

Their mom told me that when she walked into the room and saw the mess she started fussing at them and told them they were going to have to help her "clean up this big mess." To which they responded by breaking into the song I taught them early on, "Clean Up, Clean Up . . ." I hope it provided a moment of comic relief for her! It's very hard work being a mom to three toddlers and she works very hard at being a good mom.

This morning I told the boys we needed to clean up the blocks they were playing with and they again began to sing that same song--that's what reminded me of the antecdote their mom shared with me.

I hope I have taught them even more important lessons than cleaning up our own messes. I hope I have at least reinforced the lessons and guidance their very diligent parents are working to instill in them. Sister already initiates conversations about God and Jesus and tries to make sense of it all. She has a good faith foundation that I know her brothers will have as well.

For my life, I cling to scripture for the "way I should go." It's so important to rely upon the foundation of my knowledge of the Bible, gleaned from personal study, bible study and Sunday school classes and other readings. Without that foundation, I don't know how I would even function in the world with all it's competing messages and enticements.

It's so important to lay a good foundation for our lives so that when the storms come, we know where to go to find shelter. I'm happy the boys remembered the song and don't think of cleaning up after themselves as an unpleasant chore, but rather as a part of life, and as just "what you do."

I hope I can be as cheerful the next time I'm called upon to do something others might consider tedious or unpleasant.

Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. [Proverbs 22:6 NKJ]

THE MORE WE KNOW THE BIGGER WE SIN

2009-01-05T20:50:00.005-05:00

I was back with my little buddies this morning, bright and early after almost a full week off. I have enjoyed the respite and certainly feel I took good advantage of the time off but it was good to see them!

I found out that one of the twins has developed quite a few new skills in the past week. He has learned to climb out of his crib (his brother has been doing this for about 2 months). He is quite pleased with himself too. He also demonstrated that he not only looks taller, but actually is taller.

My initial observation of his slimming down and looking a little longer in his formerly rather stubby (and oh so dimpled and adorable) legs played out like this: potty seat has been moved to the family room as both boys have been expressing interest in going on the big potty like sister. Today the recently taller twin firmly grasped the potty seat by the handles, slid it across the family room floor into the foyer and up against the front door. Then he reached up and turned the deadbolt lock - to the unlocked position. Yikes!

There were plenty of other antics today - some of which took me a great deal of time to undo. Needless to say, no naps were had today because the twin with all these newly acquired skills is the one who sleeps! And he sleeps through anything. His brother actually tried to sleep today - a rare event worth mentioning in the twin annals.

Finally brother gave up - and so did I after about the fifth trip upstairs to tell the boys to get back into bed, go to sleep, stop playing, etc. Of course I knew they were secretly laughing at me and saying disparaging things about me in their secret twin language:-)

The last straw was when I heard a banging that got louder and louder. At first I thought it was the noise from the house construction going on next door. But then I realized it was coming from the boys' room. The blinds were being used to signal for help I guess - or at least to be rescued from the prison of the bedroom. By the time I wrested the blinds from twin who can now climb out of his bed, several slats hung precariously by a single cord. Brother number 2 had managed to open the bedroom door and go down the hall to sister's room and wake her up in the meantime.

Before long all three children were crying, yelling, running down the hall. OK... I won't say I didn't get aggravated at all, but gosh those children are adorable! Big sister is a real trooper, too. Those boys are into everything and she complains relatively little. Oh, she has her moments - even days, but overall she is a tough little customer. (Even though she does teach her brothers some "tricks of the trade.")

So I got to thinking about how much more trouble the boys will be getting into now that the newly-skilled twin has caught up to his brother. The more they learn, the more chaos they create. The more skills they master, the more trouble they get into. Time outs will increase. After each sentence is served, though the offending boy will come walking to me, head hung down, and wait for me hug him. (And of course I will!)

The application for my own life is that the more I study and grow in my faith, I more clearly see my capacity for sin. It's just that plain and simple. As I grasp more and more of what it means to be a Christian, I recognize more acutely how far I am from the mark. The more masterfully I can preach on theology, the more intensely I feel the sting of disappointing my Father on a regular basis.

I am so very humbled and filled with awe at how loving and gracious is our God. Then I think about how many times I tried not to laugh out loud at the mischief and chaos three little children created in my life today and how they are so darned cute and smart and precious. I'm pretty sure God thinks of me that way most of the time. He knows my heart and how ardently I desire nothing more than to live a life pleasing to Him.

It gives me comfort to think that God sees me through eyes of love, even when I create chaos and mischief.

My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. [Colossians 2:2-3 NIV]

An Out of Sorts Kind of Day

2008-12-30T19:32:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the first day back with the "little ones" in a week! It was so great to see them and they all seemed to have grown so much in just those few days! Of course the boys are of the age that a week is a long time -- they learn and develop so quickly at that age! Kind of makes me think about how we perceive time vs. how God perceives time:-)

Everyone was glad to see me too, and enjoyed showing me all their Christmas gifts. I was really laid back from my long "vacation" and the kids were really calm considering all the hype of Christmas! One of the twins even started to cry when I left, I guess because he was afraid he wouldn't see me again for another week!?

Today . . . well, the honeymoon was over today. They were all glad to see me, but all day it was like, "Oh, Mary's back." All three of them were just out of sorts--with themselves, with each other and with me! Hmph! They were not terrible - not by a long shot, but it was like they each needed to re-establish the boundaries, reiterate the rules and see if "the old girl" had forgotten everything while she was off:-)

I would tell one of the boys not to go in the road -- several times I turned him around and got down on his level and told him not to go out of the driveway. Each time he would get right to the end of the driveway and start inching out, to see how far he could go before I turned him around again. Finally, I picked him up, placed him on the grass and put the bike away. He didn't pitch a fit--he just unzipped his jacket and threw it on the ground. I guess when you're two that's about the most defiant thing you can think of:-)

The other two each had their own moments throughout the day. At one point I remember separating the boys and reminding them, "no hitting, no biting, no pushing, no grabbing, and no mean talk." Big sister likes to argue and try to negotiate and rationalize everything I say.

So, the God connection? I test the limits all the time! I try to rationalize and negotiate with God. I push the envelope, tread on thin ice, hang by a thread . . . whatever you want to call it. I press my luck, as my mom used to say. I may do the right things but I don't always have the right heart. I may say the right things, but I don't always back up my words with actions.

Sometimes, honestly, I don't even do or say the right things - and it's intentional. Yes, I really have trouble getting flustered or taking things my little charges do personally. Because I know where they're coming from. I'm pretty firm, but pretty patient. Thankfully, God is too!

So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance?[Romans 2:3-5 NIV]

When Things Don't Go As Planned

2008-12-22T10:52:00.001-05:00

Oh my! We had quite a bit of drama this morning!

Last week we decorated Christmas gifts for children's mom and dad. Yes, I actually allowed not-quite-two-year-olds to use paint! :-) They just loved it and were so excited that they were allowed to do 'big kid' stuff that their big sister was doing.

The gifts turned out beautifully - each as unique as are the three children:-) One of the boys finished his work and was ready to get down to play with his cars. I had to finally forcibly remove the paint brush from the other twin - the one who we are all surprised even has the attention span to do crafts! I think he would still be painting right now if he had been allowed to!

Today my plan was for the children to color white paper "lunch" bags in which to put the gifts. I thought it would be a great because the boys love to color and sister would be able to use her new markers which I gave her for her birthday last week.

The boys, however, were quite upset. They saw those ornaments, ready to be wrapped in tissue paper and stuffed into the bags. They wanted to do more ornaments! Now that they had seen the ornaments, coloring with crayons paled in comparison to painting! They each became more and more irate as I continued to impress upon them how much FUN it would be to color the bags!

Ultimately the bags, each with about 4 grudgingly stroked crayon marks, were thrown on the floor in a fit of absolute outrage! The crayons were flung across the table and the boys were bellowing at the top of their lungs. I'm sure they were wondering how in the world I could play such a cruel joke on them -- show them the FUN project and then expect them to do something not nearly as exciting.

The thing is, if they had trusted me, the project for today would have been fun. It wasn't what they had expected or planned, but my plan would have yielded a good result - one they would have liked. But it wasn't what they had planned. They had other ideas about what would be fun.

I couldn't really get upset with them. I just gave up on MY plan and held them until they settled down. Ultimately raisins and wheat thins won them over and all was forgotten. Why wasn't I flustered or upset? Because I saw myself in them all too clearly!

So often I make a plan - with our without God's guidance and direction in advance - and then when God intervenes and changes the plan, I fight it! I don't bellow and throw things but honestly, from time to time I have felt like it. More often than I care to admit, I have questioned God and even gotten upset with Him when He changes things up in my life.

Unlike the twins, I don't "let go and let God" nearly as quickly as they "let go and let Mary" take control. So yes, I have a great deal of work to do in the area of trust AND obedience:-/

Hmmm. . . Guess this will be the last of the chronicles in 2008. I have no doubt God is not finished teaching me about Him and His love, though. I'm really looking forward to where He's going to take us all next year. Of course, the day isn't over yet!

Merry Christmas!

What Happens When One Becomes Two?

2008-12-16T19:22:00.000-05:00

It's not what you might think! I have always been fascinated by twins and the boys I care for are especially fascinating little people. Just think about it - they were together at the moment of conception! They have been and will be a pair, a team, a unit, "the twins" their entire lives.

These boys also speak in what has been referred to as "twin talk." From a very early age, and especially since they became exceedingly vocal about a year ago, they communicate profusely with each other. It sounds like babble to us, but it is so clear they know what the other is saying--some primal connection that they alone share.

Being active boys and part of a sibling group that is very dramatic, intelligent, inquisitive, strong-willed, independent and bright, they fight - a lot - with each other and their sister. But let me tell you, if one of those boys is placed in time out, the other follows and sits quietly next to his brother - even if the offending brother is in time out for some infringement upon the rights of the other!

Where is all this leading? Well, today big sister had morning preschool and one of the boys was taken to the hospital to have an x-ray on a foot that seems to have been bothering him. Dad and other twin had to "sneak out" because the left-behind twin was determined he was getting his jacket and going along--after all the boys never go anywhere without the other one!

So for a couple of hours it was just one little now-alone twin and me. We had a wonderful, rare, one-on-one time reading books and watching favorite videos. He even got to practice turning on and off the porch light about 25 or 30 times - learning "on" and "off." On the way to pick up sister at noon though, he kept stressing about the fact that his brother's car seat (and so his brother) was not in the car. "Buckle?" He kept asking, referring to 'buckling in' the boys in their car seats.

I got to thinking about how disorienting and confusing it must have been for him to be suddenly alone. Yes, I was there, but brother was not. And brother is always with him. They share a room, they share a bond that no one else on earth will ever understand or break. They shared their mother's womb.

I thought he must feel the way I do sometimes in my relationship with God. Sometimes I feel as if I'm traveling through a time without God's presence. It's not that God has sneaked out the door, but rather that I have turned aside or turned away altogether. I become hard-headed (stiff-necked?) and prideful and push God out of the picture. God is there with me, but I don't acknowledge Him.

At some point though, I begin to feel the way my little lonely twin must have felt for a while today: as if I am utterly and completely on my own - as if part of me is missing. That's when I run back to God, like the prodigal I have been, begging for forgiveness.

The "twin talk" between God and me is through the Holy Spirit living and working in me - interceding on my behalf when I don't know what to pray. I think about how truly joyful the twins are when the other one is finally awake from a nap--or home from the hospital with Dad--and I get it. I really do. That's how I feel when I know God has already forgiven my sin.

What a relief. What a great joy. What true blessing to be a recipient of God's grace.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. [Romans 8:26-27 NIV]

Cheerios, Bananas -- and Sin?

2008-12-15T13:39:00.000-05:00

OK. Bear with me here! It's been a busy morning but my mind keeps going back to this morning's breakfast for the twins. At 23 months, they are desperately trying to be like their 4 year old sister -- I mean they want to do absolutely everything she does!

Well . . . she eats Cheerios in a cereal bowl. Most mornings the boys will snack on dry cereal while their 'real breakfast' is being prepared but this morning, since sister was having Cheerios -- well, I think you can figure it out. They were not happy when I placed a handful of Cheerios on their trays. As soon as they started fussing I knew what was up so I got out two bowls and two spoons and placed one of each on their trays.

The boys immediately began scooping up Cheerios and putting them in their bowls. Then they achieved varying degrees of success in actually scooping the Cheerios up with the spoons and getting Cheerios into their mouths. After about half the Cheerios ended up on their laps, the boys were still pretty hungry so I gave them each 1/2 banana. Out go the Cheerios, into the bowl goes the bananas:-) One twin ultimately gave up and picked up the banana and ate it with his hands then went to work on Cheerios off the tray.

The other twin got more and more frustrated with himself. He finally picked up the bowl and dumped out the banana and replaced the Cheerios. OK by this time, he's pretty upset because he's really hungry and not much food has actually made it into his stomach, let alone into his mouth!

Finally, he picked up the bowl full of Cheerios and held it over his head, intending to make one final angry gesture before he really looses it! Guess what? The Cheerios didn't fall out of the bowl! He was quite surprised - as was I! Fortunately that allowed an opportunity to make a joke and act silly, and remove both mangled banana, Cheerios- adorned cereal bowl and slip some buttered toast on the tray all in one fell swoop.

I don't know why I had this thought in the midst of the breakfast drama, but I imagine God has opened my eyes to see things through a different lens since I decided to start this blog. Think about it. Isn't that how sin is. Once we sin, it sticks to us, hanging on for dear life until we confess it and ask God to swoop it away?!

Like Cheerios sticking to a banana-y cereal bowl, sin just hangs on and no matter how we try to dump it out or throw it off, until we face it, confess it, and ask God to make it right, we're just not going to have peace about it.

God exalted him to his own right hand as Prince and Savior that he might give repentance and forgiveness of sins to Israel.[Acts 15:31 NIV]

Children Are A Blessing

2008-12-13T14:57:00.000-05:00

That's often said by those who don't have them, by those who want the world to believe they're 100% thrilled 100% of the time to have their own children, or by grandparents who are speaking of their grandchildren!

But you know what? It IS true!

Jesus made it very clear that children were important to Him. More than that He tells us that we must become like little children to make it into the kingdom of heaven! ". . . Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. [Matthew 18:3 RSV] God values children so much, He made His own son into one!

I don't think Jesus meant we were to be timid. I'm pretty sure He wasn't telling us to run up to someone we love and throw our arms around their knees with such delight that they almost fall over! Although that's really wonderful when it happens! He probably wasn't telling us to taste absolutely everything--everything(!)either.

What he was talking about, I think, is that we are to have that same sense of wonder at and curiosity about God's world. We are to have a child's inquisitive mind when we seek to know God better. I think He was telling us to be humble and quiet, to watch and to listen. And it really wouldn't hurt to throw our arms around each other once in a while, would it?

Little children, let us not love in word or speech but in deed and in truth. [1 John 3:18 RSV]